diazkoolkidzz discussion

1. Update pages and include an impacting passage that lets others know more about the book is. Explain it!
2. How does this book relate to emotional intelligence (all five domains)?
3. In your opinion, who should read this book? Why?
4. What have been three important lessons you have learned from this book?

A impacting passage for me is that you have to believe to change a habit. In The Power of Habit Charles Duhigg says, "If you believe you can change-if you make it a habit the change become real". This is impact to me because I would always try to change something but when it didn't work I would give up but this book made me change that way of thinking because I know I have to believe in myself to change. My book relates to the five domains because habits are manage by your self and motivated from yourself and knowing your habits make you self aware. Habits affect our relationships and makes us socially aware. People who struggle with procrastination or people that have bad habits needs to read this book so they can break there habits and stop procrastinating because it holds them back from their full potential. I have learned that habits cannot be fully changed, there are rewards to habits, and there are habits that I do that I am not even aware of.

1. "Its tempting to pretend that our fears and problems are not always with us. It is tempting to close our eyes to them, half hoping that they will, of their own accord, go away." Basically the more you ignore difficulties- the worse the issues get (still not solved). Not acknowledging the issue creates irritations in relationships, decline in confidence and loss of intrest in things that once brought you joy (sometimes depression and such)
2. Majority of the book is social awareness (recognizing others with the issues/ how relationships are inpacted, Self awareness (how to acknowledge your own issues and where theyre rooted from), Self management (steps to fix the problems) and self motivation (recognizing how deep/ un finished issues are what take away a lot of motivation.
3. anyone whose major defense mechanism (psychology- there are 9 specific defense mechanisms) is repression. If someone prefers information to be delivered bluntly/without much fluff it works really well too.
4.
-ignoring issues dont fix them
-not fixing issues takes joy out of the things you one loved
-you have to communicate to others/ admit flaws to fix anything
-I am apparently a sad old man named Donald that lives in a nursing home
- dont commit to something that would be to big for you to handle later

1. "I'm going to introduce you to a wonderful and somewhat radical phrase, and I want you to write it down right now: "Nothing is more important than my well-being."' She stresses this phrase throughout the entirity of the book. She explains it as you not being able to provide for others if you do not provide for yourself first.

2. This book relates to self-awareness because it states you need to be aware of yourself before you help others, self-management because you need to mentally reorganize yourself to succeed, self-motivation because you have to push yourself to reach new heights, social-awareness because you have to understand what others are going through before you can help them, and relationship management because you have to know when others need help, and then when to let them be.

3. I feel like anyone trying to manage a schedule and help others whilst disregarding themselves in the process should read this book. I only hit 2 of those 3 things, so some of this book doesn't relate to me, but it helps nonetheless.

4. I have learned to look at my workload in a different way (no more overwhelmed poker), to stop complaining and start thanking others and yourself, and to appreciate yourself, because you are perfect.

This book relates to emotional intelligence with Social-Awareness and Relationship Management by explaining how to motivate people and how to center conversations on others rather than yourself, the other domains aren't as evident because it focuses on other people not you.
In my opinion people who want to learn how to talk to people successfully should read my book because it explains how you should focus on others interests to intrigue them and allow them to talk about themselves.
Three important lessons i have learned are to convince others to talk about themselves, make others feel important, and talk about other interests

1. I am on page 100 in my book ‘how to be a badass’. An impactful passage within the first 100 pages is “...always seeking outside approval that you’re good enough or cool enough or talented enough or worthy enough...” I found this impactful because I tend to do this . Seeking approval from others will get you absolutely no where for yourself , you will never truly except who you are if you seek what others think.
2. My book relates to self-awareness mostly by giving you ways that you may act or be like saying “-The better our bodies feel, the happier and more productive we are.” Showing that everything works together so if our bodies feel good so should we and the other way around. Self-management is shown by saying “...make a conscious effort to increase your joy in whatever capacity you can.” Showing that you should do whatever you can to be happy , whatever makes you happy take action and stick with it because self happiness is everything. Self-motivation is shown by “Tale care of yourself as if you’re the most awesome person you’ve ever met.” This shows motivation in being confident with yourself telling yourself that you are great and you can do anything ! Social-awareness is shown “It’s none of your business what other people are doing.” Showing that what other people are going or what other people think shouldn’t be allowed to affect you , you shouldn’t care because it’s none of your business. your not going to grow or build on yourself when you care on someone else’s opinion. Relationship-management is shown “..kind of person who puts everyone else’s needs first...” showing that if you constantly put other people in your relationship before yourself you need to start doing stuff for. Yourself take action in what’s making you happy.

1.)My book has been very interesting so far, explaining things such as habits, time management, and scheduling. This has advanced my knowledge on these topics plus more. I feel it has been beneficial in the end.
2.)As the author goes through the book, its a new way to better yourself each chapter she talks about scheduling which can better yourself in almost all EI domains. She also talks about what kind of person you are whether you are a questioner or a rebel knowing what you are good and bad at helps all EI domains.
3.) I find this book would be better for older teens and adults it talks about some things younger people wouldn't understand because of there age.
4.) I have learned that scheduling can be a very helpful thing to advance your EI domain. Ive also liked the way she talks on the person we all are. I feel she has taught me alot of good thing to further advance myself.

3. I think that Zion should read this book because I’ve realized that he has a hard time doubting his self and his ability in class . This book could help him overcome self doubt and allow him to start being aware of his capability and potential and loosen up how hard he is on himself.
4. 1) I’ve learned to take faith in “source energy” god because he can make your life a little bit easier if you believe and have faith.
2) I’ve learned to take action don’t even think about it do what you feels right and take action and see where it takes you .
3) Lastly I learned to never give up on your dreams because only you can take action and turn your dreams into reality.

"This is why it was so hard for the Getty, at least at the beginning, to accept the opinion of people like Hoving and Harrison and Zeri: it was a lot easier to listen to the scientists and lawyers, because the scientists and the lawyers could provide pages and pages of documentation supporting their conclusions. I think that is a mistake, and if we are to learn to improve the quality of the decisions we make, we need to accept the mysterious nature of our snap judgments. We need to respect the fact that it is possible to know without knowing why you know and accept that - sometimes - we're better off that way." (Blink page 52). We struggle to accept the information that lacks an explanation, we lose our mind trying to figure out why we just have a natural knowing of something when we need to accept that we won't always be self-aware to those things
2. It mainly relates to self-awareness and through that it relates to the other domains. It shows that when you find out what to look for in how a person acts and behaves in front and not in front of you, you can manage your relationships and be socially aware of the world around you. It also explains that you won't always be consciously aware that you know things and you will have to manage and be okay that you won't know.
3. Those that truly enjoy setting up a scene and understanding what goes on in your subconscious then you will truly enjoy this book. He writes several paragraphs building up the what goes on and then digs in to how it applies to you.
4. I have learned that I need to be okay with not being always self-aware about why I have a feeling why I know something (that has driven my mind on all sorts of crazy paths). Secondly that in a bad and good relationship, there is a common pattern between all relationships that whether it is good or bad, that you can have a positive or negative mindset toward it which causes why it is good or bad. Finally that you can learn twice as much of a person by observing there room than talking to them face to face.

1. "They procrastinate because it makes sense, given how vulnerable they feel to criticism, failure and their own perfectionism" My book is about procrastination and how these things are what creates us to procrastinate. These things are what stops us from getting our work done.
2. My book relates to self-awareness by me having to be aware of my bad habits in order to know what i do to procrastinate and how i do it in order for me to begin to find ways to stop procrastinating. For self-management, i have to manage my feelings and thoughts in order for me to be guided toward production. For self motivation my book talks a lot about how i need to start positive talking to ourselves in order for us to keep wanting to continue our goal because negativity just holds us back from going forward.My book doesn't talk a lot about noticing on other people but for social awareness we have to notice when someone is telling you what to do for intense our parents when it needs to be what we want. Lastly for relationship management my book talks about having the relationship with someone but not letting them be in control with your task or goals.
3. In my opinion the people who should read this book is anyone who is procrastinating in any type of task. My book can relate to anyone is always waiting to the last minute to get things done before the due date. My book also list very great strategies that anyone can use in order for them to reduce the amount of procrastination and to eventually stop it.
4. One lesson I have learned from this book is that i need to have fun and hang out with my friends in order to get creativity and the motivation i need to continue and or start a goal. Another lesson i have learned is that there are words that will prevent me from doing these and i have to find the more encouraging one to keep me motivated in my task. Lastly the third lesson i have learned is that i have to start by getting "my parents want me to do it so i have to do it" Neil (The author) has said that we do things we dont want to because someone like our loved ones expect us to. I have to be in control not others.
4.

1. As i was reading this book, there was a couple of topics that i was able to apply and use as further reference to. One thing i love is how he includes different ways or styles to help others apply his techniques as well. One quote in my book that was impacting to me was a quote from Julia Louise Woodruff saying, "Out of the strain of doing, into the peace of doing." This means that when you finish the task at hand, you will have the peace of it being done.

2. For my self-awareness this book shows me that i need to be more aware of my emotions to decide which next step to take. David Allen also addresses a lot of self-management topics in his book when he talks about ways to de-stress from life. As self-motivation, he motivates you to become better at sorting through your problems and fixing them. there isn't any social-awareness throughout this book since it teaches you how to better your own self. There was one moment i can remember where he talks about relationship-management. This is where he says (in a nut shell) to be honest to others so you wont have to deal with the stress of a messed up relationships

3. In my own opinion, i believe that my brother should read this since he is under more stress then me.for some reason, he doesn't show it often.

4. One lesson i learned is that writing your thoughts down is one good way to de-stress. Another thing is that a lot of other stress also comes from problems in your stress. Finally, i know now that i need to clarify my issues with my own self

1)"To be Toltec is a way of life, it is a way of life where there are no leaders and no followers, where you have your own truth and live your own truth. A Toltec becomes wise, becomes wild, and becomes free again."- Basically, the lifestyle is essentially you run it on your own accord and you learn more about yourself based on that accord.

2) In the domains of E.I, the book relates to Self-Awareness in a sense of taking back who you are and setting yourself on to a life where you call the shots based on your own ethics and beliefs, Self-Management where it teaches you that what you say and put into the world affects how the world communicates to/with you, Self-Motivation in conveying the idea that you have to be serious and positive in your words or else you'd be letting yourself down, Social-Awareness, in understanding what's been taught and what society views as correct while also understanding that not everything is taught from good intention but out of tradition, and Relationship Management where it tells you that you shouldn't take everything or anything personally, because sometimes people say things that aren't aimed at you, it's a reflection of inner turmoil and some relationships aren't worth ruining over someones bad day.

3) In my opinion everyone should read the book, because the lessons connect to everyone in explaining the path to controlling your life and living it on your morals

4) 3 important lessons: [1]Be Impeccable With Your Word, [2], Break Old Agreements, [3] Always Do Your Best.

1. An impacting passage is in on page 35 paragraph 2 it says, "it lies in the ability to get the other persons point of view and see things from that persons angle as well as from your own." This is an impacting passage because it describes how people should understand others as your in their shoes. By seeing their point of view's of things it also makes you feel how they feel about certain scenarios.
2. This book relates to the five domians because it for self awaeness because it talks about about it talks about about how people are showing empathy for a person that can make alot of friends by trying to make the people like him. For self management my book mentions different people who had to be able to be manage the feelings about things happening in their life. For self awareness the book talks about because the book talks about how if you are aware of how people are you can be able to encourage other people to do by think of ways the person can do to help that person. For social awareness the book talks about ways to make friends and how one person would be a social person to his audience and always said he love them. For relationship management the book talks about how people don't get along and then works thing out and work it out.
3. In my opinion who sould read the book is people that are working or about to start working, because this book talks about life skills to help you understand or to talk different people the right way.
4.Three important lessons I learned where...
-By putting your self in someone elses shoes you can better understand them.
-get the person to listen to to and never give up
-honest appreciation got results where criticism and ridicule failed.

1. An impacting passage from my self-help book, "This is the Day" by Tim Tebow, is about taking opportunities in life, and not thinking about the past and the missed opportunities that happened because of it. Tim writes, "While there are always things I could look back on and wish I did better or could change, I don't want to live in the past. When you keep wondering what could have been or what you should have done differently, here's what happens: you miss the present moment and cripple your potential in the future." This represents one of Tim's main ideas in the book: to not miss opportunities when they are presented in life. When you are stuck in the past and let those moments affect your present life, doors for your opportunities will close, and you'll miss out. This also shows a second theme, to not let your past define you and guide you, but to use your past to motivate yourself to take the opportunities. When you go out and take a chance, you are taking advantage of opportunities when presented in your life, and even if it doesn't work out, you at least took the chance, and something may still happen because of that chance that was taken.
2. My book only lightly expands on how to improve on the E. I. domains, while favoring more on Self-Awareness and Self-Motivation, and how to improve on your inner self, and those lead to Self-Management. While not explored on how to improve the domains, he uses each domain multiple times in examples, experiences, and times where he used them. So while not really expanded on, I can find ways that it is shown, and how I can improve on them that way.
3. I think that Christians, and people who like sports should read the book. I think this because Tim Tebow likes sports and is a Christian, and he uses experiences from both of those aspects in his life to show how he uses the E.I domains and improved in his life, and how we can use those domains in ours.
4. One important lesson that I learned is that your past doesn't/shouldn't define who you are and how it affects you. While I did know this, I helped learn this on another level, and how he has used these experiences to show this lesson. Another lesson is that you should make memories with your family while you can before they are gone. Again, I knew this lesson, but I never knew how to use this, but his experiences showed me how this principle is used, and now I can try to use this. Another lesson is that you should pay attention to others more than what they seem. This taught me that people are more than what they seem, and have a story, and shouldn't be taken at face value.

1. On page 151 of my book Unfu*k yourself it states “The impossible only becomes possible in the moment you believe it is. We would accomplish more things if we did not think of them as impossible. You could throw yourself at something a thousand times, failing miserably on every attempt, and yet succeed on attempt #1,001” If people stopped focusing on how something is impossible and stopped giving up because it would be “a waste of time” to do something “impossible” then we could accomplish many things because we would be focused on getting it done and not stop until we accomplish our goals.
2. Self Motivation-“if you are willing to generate that state of willingness, that’s your doorway to the setbacks and ultimately creating the progress and change in your life that you’re seeking.” This relates to me because I used to always want to do a handstand but I wasn’t motivated to practice. So I technically didn’t really really want to do it. Self Awareness-“The more aware you become of your handwiring, the more space and opportunity become available in those areas.” Once I was aware of certain things in my life, things became clearer because I understood myself a little bit more. So once I fully understand myself and know exactly what I want then I’ll focus most of my time on that and find different ways to get it. Self Management- “ you can take back your freedom to choose. And that’s by understanding how your mind works, seeing what it’s doing as it is, and being able to cognitively choose something else.” Once you take control of you’re life you will be able to choose what you want to do and figure out how to do accomplish that.
Social awareness and Relationship management- Celebrities seem to have something you don’t, but believe me, their rise to the top was anything but certain or easy. Most of them doubted it every single day, sometimes hundreds of times per day. That’s right, they sat there, just like you are right now wondering how they would make it.” We have to be aware that the famous people we look up to struggled too. But they kept trying and didn’t give up. We can try to help other people when they feel like giving up by saying that it’s ok to take a break but giving up will only make matters worse.
3. I think my brother should read this book because it focuses a lot about self doubt and not giving up. My brother is sometimes very lazy and every time there’s something that looks hard and that makes him have to work he says right away “it’s impossible, I can’t do it”. He still doesn’t understand that trying and not giving up will help him get closer to his goals. He doesn’t have examples of how people who didn’t give up made their way up in life. But this book talks a lot about that, gives examples and breaks it down so that it’s easy to understand. This book also doesn’t sugarcoat things. My brother is always treated like a baby and I feel like he needs to get out of that habit and start just getting right to the point of things, which is exactly what my book does.
4. Three lessons I’ve learned is that if you’re not willing to do something than you’re just dreaming and won’t want to make it happen, self doubt is the main cause of our depression and it’s a little silly because most people won’t even have time to look at you and judge. It’s all in our heads. And finally, another lesson I learned is that if you don’t embrace the uncertainty, meaning that you always do what you’re comfortable with and never try new things, then you’re “living in the past” and not moving forward.

1.) My book is The Gifts Of Imperfections. It says “...trying to feel the feeling, staying mindful about numbering behaviors, and trying to lean into the discomfort of hard emotions.” This book is trying to explain that it’s ok to feel a certain way, but we also need to know our triggers and our specific behaviors so that when we feel that way so we can deal with it in the best way possible.
2.) This book relates to self-awareness by saying “Shame is a full-contact emotion. Men and women with high levels of shame resilience know when shame is happening.” So basically it’s telling us that if you can get through the feeling if shame, you’ll know when you are starting to feel that shame. It relates to self-regulation by saying “ “...do something deliberately relaxing. Find something inspiring to do rather than something soul-sucking.” I thought this meant that in order to regulate yourself, you need to do things that you find relaxing, not something society does or society expects of you. The author relates to self-motivation by saying “...when I felt emotionally, physically, spiritually done, I’d try slowing down rather than relying on my old standbys: pushing through, soldiering on, and sucking it up.” She is giving an example of how we can help keep ourselves motivated. It relates to social-awareness by saying “Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.” I thought of this as once we are aware of the connections we share with other people, then we can have an even deeper connection with them than before. My book relates to relationship management by saying “ It’s amazing-yet perhaps not surprising-that the connectedness we experience in our relationships impacts the way our brain develops and performs.” I never realized it until now, but the good relationships we have with people make us feel positive, and the negative or toxic relationships we have with people make us feel bad, or not happy.
3.) I feel people that doubt themselves a lot, don’t think they are enough, or are just stressed a lot in general should read this book. This book talks a lot about being more aware of your self and being aware of your stress triggers, so basically how to manage yourself and your emotions. People that need help with learning how to manage that should read this book.
4.) I have learned that when we are kind to ourselves,we hold compassion that can be radiated towards others. I learned that “Perfectionism is a self-destructive and addictive belief system...” I already knew that no one is perfect but I never thought about it in this way. Something else I learned is that “Where perfectionism exists, shame is always lurking. In fact, shame is the birthplace of perfectionism.” I never realized but people that might think they are perfect, probably feel a lot of shame because they know inside they aren’t perfect.

1.) “[...]When our lives bounce through pockets of turbulence— such as the uncertainty of joblessness or confrontation with death or a sense that our work is not making a difference or that we don’t belong—our brains grab hold of our Something Larger, as if it can stop our lives or the world from tumbling out of the sky. And it works. It helps us tolerate the uncertainty, the mortality, the helplessness or loneliness, until we find ourselves on the other side of the turbulence and back in smooth airspace[...]”. In, “burnout: the secret to unlocking the stress cycle,” this book decided to soccer punch this passage to my face. When they (the author) states, “our Something Larger,” they’re referring to our “meaning,” the power we carry inside of us that help us resist and recover from burnout— as well as when we feel the most powerful doing what we’re meant to be doing.

For example, my Something Larger is: writing; and the passage presented made me realize just how much I clung to it as an emotional support buddy. It was a hard realization moment that helped me complete my incomplete stress cycle from all those years ago. It hurt to look into it, pay attention to what I thought was only negative, and to learn to see it with compassion and non-judgment.

2.) Self-Awareness: “[...]why can’t it handle my perfectly normal amount of stress?’ ‘Perfectly normal? You’re changing jobs, moving houses, and maybe getting divorced—that’s facing three of the worst stressors known to the industrialized West all at once. What exactly are you expecting from your body?’[...]” This related to me, because at times I could get carried away with work and ignore what my body’s energy is telling me—but my body is like an infant, it’s telling me what I need and you can only ignore your body’s cries for so long before they deafen you. After this text, I’ve paid more attention to what my body is asking me and set an official bed time so my body is practically throwing a tantrum because I won’t let it rest.

Self-Regulation: “[...]You may not have been aware of how bad it was, but your body was[...]” This relates to self-awareness, but more physical. Our body knows how to management itself, but we (our mind) controls it, so when it says our body is aware of our stress levels, it’s telling our mind that we have to do something about it.

Self-Motivation: “[...]The tremendous power of understating the Monitor is they once were aware of how it works, we can influence our own brains functioning, with strategies for dealing with both the controllable and uncontrollable stressors[...]” This passageway oddly motivated some inner part of, because knowing I can change and control how I view my goals (my monitor) lights this fire that makes me more passionate to reach such achievements.

Social Skills: “[...]Emily saw herself on TV and worries that her chin is too pointy because one time, years ago, somebody said it was[...].” Social Skills involve how humans interact with each other, both verbally and nonverbally, as well as through personal appearance. So, when we comment on a person’s appearance, no matter how we mean it, we’ve conveyed our thoughts and feelings of them to them. Your meaning could’ve been so little but it can have such a big impact on someone long-term, and vise-versa.

Empathy: n/a

3.) Personally, I believe my mother should read this book with a burning passion. Most of the domains and theme advice, “burnout,” has presented (such as energy, stress, self-regulation/awareness) falls onto her like an avalanche of boulders. I strongly believe most of the advice, tips, and stories would connect with my mother’s inner self and help her grow into a stronger person.

4.) Three important lessons I’ve learned from my book have been: prioritize my body’s need, release my stress through forms of sobbing my eyes out and completing the cycle, and understand that it’s ok to ask for help— my body can only take so much.