Grief and God discussion

In the months after my son died I struggled a lot with religion and the church/pastor(s) in particular. Every time I had an appointment, I just got more confused and eventually plain angry. One in particular was very dismissive and he reprimanded me on more than one occasion. Their views didn't align with mine and it felt as if they treated my grief as a faith issue and not a huge loss, trauma and deep grief. The one pastor (grief counselor) said that Christians mourn differently than non-believers. So, that meant that I cried too hard or too much, questioning where in the universe my child was and that all the amazing experiences of his spiritual presence were directly from the devil and we (Christians) should not visit mediums or have/acknowledge visits from our loved ones. In short, everything I experienced about the unseen world was wrong and 'from the devil'. I felt so loved and comforted...

So, with their views not in alignment with mine, the road led me elsewhere. I didn't loose my belief in God, but I certainly lost my trust in the church as an institution. If you don't play in the boundaries of their rules and beliefs, you are wrong.

There is nothing Christian about this book but it highlights many of the things I've learned since I was a child. And yes, these things did bite me in the ***, so learning that I am not the only one in this experience is helpful.
Terri Daniel