I wanted to talk about the discussion point that were from the readinggroupchoices.com 1. If given the opportunity, would you choose to investigate your family history and/or trauma? Discuss whether you believe unearthing these mysteries would bring a sense of healing or enforce deeper shame.
2. Margaret illustrates her thought process regarding her family’s circumstances through the years, from early childhood to grown adulthood. Reflect on the differences and similarities between how she copes as an adult and as a child. What insights can we glean about a child’s personal experience through family trauma with the help of this re-telling? In what ways do you process family difficulties differently at this time, compared to how you might have coped in earlier ages?
3. Why do you believe it was that the author’s family felt it was best not to talk about topics like mental health? How would talking about these subjects benefit a family, and in what ways might it be detrimental? Has mental health been an open topic to discuss with your family? Or can you relate to the author in her need to push for answers?
4. While some may cope with troubling memories by forgetting, Margaret uses documentation as a tool to help her revisit and recreate new meaning out of those experiences. How might creating this book help both her and her family move forward from a past not processed? Share a personal experience where new meaning and purpose were forged out of an unsettling time.
5. On page 197, the author shares, “Logic played no role in any of this. Mental illness defies logic.” Do you have an experience or memory that could help testify in support of this statement? What preconceived notions about mental illness did you have prior to starting this book? How have those ideas shifted and changed, if at all, after finishing it?
6. When it came to supporting Ted, Margaret, Zach, and their father agreed that the highest priority was to help him feel accepted. How can accepting someone prove more of a help than trying to fix them? In the light of this, what significance does the interview that Margaret conducts with Ted hold?
7. In what way is Margaret’s story more than just of her own – more than just of her family’s own? Mental illness, divorce, and challenging family dynamics are struggles more common than a typical household would like to admit. Consider the reasons why a story like this is an important one to share.
2. Margaret illustrates her thought process regarding her family’s circumstances through the years, from early childhood to grown adulthood. Reflect on the differences and similarities between how she copes as an adult and as a child. What insights can we glean about a child’s personal experience through family trauma with the help of this re-telling? In what ways do you process family difficulties differently at this time, compared to how you might have coped in earlier ages?
3. Why do you believe it was that the author’s family felt it was best not to talk about topics like mental health? How would talking about these subjects benefit a family, and in what ways might it be detrimental? Has mental health been an open topic to discuss with your family? Or can you relate to the author in her need to push for answers?
4. While some may cope with troubling memories by forgetting, Margaret uses documentation as a tool to help her revisit and recreate new meaning out of those experiences. How might creating this book help both her and her family move forward from a past not processed? Share a personal experience where new meaning and purpose were forged out of an unsettling time.
5. On page 197, the author shares, “Logic played no role in any of this. Mental illness defies logic.” Do you have an experience or memory that could help testify in support of this statement? What preconceived notions about mental illness did you have prior to starting this book? How have those ideas shifted and changed, if at all, after finishing it?
6. When it came to supporting Ted, Margaret, Zach, and their father agreed that the highest priority was to help him feel accepted. How can accepting someone prove more of a help than trying to fix them? In the light of this, what significance does the interview that Margaret conducts with Ted hold?
7. In what way is Margaret’s story more than just of her own – more than just of her family’s own? Mental illness, divorce, and challenging family dynamics are struggles more common than a typical household would like to admit. Consider the reasons why a story like this is an important one to share.