Mental Illness Support Group discussion

feel free to cent about sh and other things like that. remeber to mark sensitive content with "!!!" in the beginning

!!! Most of this will be nondescript but I will mark when I mention a few things !!!!

I've been having a hard time resisting the urge to sh lately. I had done it a lot when I was younger (12-19) but had stopped for quite a few years. Last year my mental health took a dive and I ended up sh-ing again, a few times over a couple of months. I had been doing okay for the past few months but I can't stop thinking about it again and am having trouble focusing on other things when I'm not reading or sleeping.

I get urges to physically sh but also to just put myself into scenarios that are self destructive. These moods usually only come occasionally and I just wait them out for a day or two until they're gone. But when they stick around for more than a few days it becomes difficult to focus on anything else and not think of ways that could potentially be risky.

!!!! Risky behaviors and sh that cross my mind (and I sometimes actually do) include drinking, drugs (nothing hard), doing anything that will help me forget or stop thinking, picking at scabs, plucking hairs, seeing how far I can get before I hurt myself.

I've been doing therapy for a while now and have dealt with some trauma and depression/anxiety but it's expensive and as a university/college student I have almost no income so can't go very often.

Thanks for listening to me vent, no one that I know really knows the extent of how much this impacts my daily life and it's too difficult to confide in anyone because I'm scared of being a burden and having people worry about me.

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