Writers Café discussion

Well, it seems that I have joined this group. Oh indeed I have.

Here, I shall post my works, though keep in mind they shall be entered in spoiler form only, upon one comment, in a table of contents. Then, once I have posted stories, you may comment to your leisure.

The 2nd comment upon this page shall hold my works, be it written in a few minutes, of a poetry sort, or perhaps it will simply be an idea I have scrawled down for you to give me advice on. I hope you enjoy.

Here is a key to the odd little phrases you may see beside my writing.

1. work in progress: I fully intend to continue working on this, and it shall be completed but check for updates.
2. unfinished: I am either in writer's block or haven't the time to complete this, so it may never get done.
3. idea: This one is exactly how it sounds. Simply an idea I desire people to look at and give me advice one.
4. no critique: Occasionally, rarely as a matter of fact, will I want to critique on the work and I am simply posting it for the enjoyment of others. When I ask for no critique, please do not argue. I have my reasons.

My Works

Poems
1. Nothing May Break Thy Love: (view spoiler)[There once lay a passion burning bright

Within the heart of lover and maiden both

For each felt a love that whispered with beauty



Until they met their inevitable doom

All within light moments

That quickly transformed to dark



As the blade danced through the air

Striking true, mingling with content joy

Oh maiden, so sweet



Tears dripping onto stained chiffon

Clasping a pale hand, now trembling

And thy murder rings through the evening air



With a choke of breath and gasp of love

The grip is slackened

But the passion burns on. (hide spoiler)]
2. Why Do You Leave? (view spoiler)[Where do you go on this fine day of life?

You leave your own very lovely wife?

Shall I run after in heels of ebony?

Or await your return, when it is you and me?

Do you desire to leave me alone?

Where the waves crash about, cursing my home

My dear, why do you escape?

I so long for the hand that curves my shape

My one, my only love to be

I see that it is over, but why me? (hide spoiler)]
work in progress

Short Stories
1. In The Forest Where All Is Possible: (view spoiler)[
In the forest where all things are possible, beauty springs from the dark clutches of humans, and prances about in the only place untouched by those who cause harm. By occasionally even that is taken in the greedy and meaty paws, and crushed. A quaint cave is nestled within the dense forest, the thick foliage providing a protective barrier from all that watch. And in this cave slinks dark shadows, ones that had been ejected from the rest of civilization, and now inhabitants a place where it truly belongs, a forest energized by mysteries and thoughts. All who come are welcomed, as long as they do not bring what the forest does not want. It doesn’t desire that which was brought to harm. Or to give hardships that the forest does not already have. As the days drag on, personal wonders exploding secretively throughout the forest, things remain virtually unchanged to the untrained eye. But things can always change. It seemed to be a simple evening, the ever black night creeping in, and reaching arms out to pull the red streaks of sunset away, to tug free the last bits of brilliant light away, tendrils of darkness working silently and quickly, laying a blanket in the light’s wake. The moon swept in gracefully, to await all sleep, to aid life in the quest of lessening worries. The trees stood watch, as usual, standing tall and mighty, the world’s greatest warriors and guards. A young sapling resided below the graceful adults, ever watching to best learn, awestruck. A squirrel lounged in a small crevice within a withered oak tree, the small furry creature wrapped around itself. A bird’s eggs, abandoned in a well-formed bundle of stout twigs, clingy mud and long, peculiarly yellow grass. A low rumble slithers through the serenity of darkness, and a bird emits a screech of contempt, fluttering into the air with a indigenous cry. The surrounding area is skeptical. What is this odd sound, one that they haven’t heard before? In a moment, they discover the answer. A roar mightier than a lion’s growl bursts through, sending shockwaves through the ground, tumbling innocent children of winged creatures to the ground, smashing them before life reaches their cove of new beginnings. Screeches resound through the vast forest, as the intention of harm becomes clear. A snarling, oil spitting machine chugging forward, spewing ink black gunk. All of a sudden it stopped, and a heavy set man tumbled from the chair, a stupid grin plastered on a an equally arrogant face, a fine stubble sprouting on the man’s face. He carry a single lighter, a metal wrapped item gripped in dingy hands. Flicking it open with an almost lethargic action, he placed the lighter against a lone tree, and ran. Almost immedietely


All agony requires is a spark. A spark of indignation, or of intended worry. A bit of fury, or pure foolishness and selfish intentions. And that is what brought the destruction of beauty to this small vicinity. According to the actions of most in this world today, all life that is not their own is rather insignificant, and natural grace and mystery does not have a place in the life of a civilized human being. (hide spoiler)]

So...anybody interested in providing critique on any?

My one short story so far, I realize is not seperated into paragraphs. I apologize if it is difficult to read, but I did not change it yet.