Allison Caudill

“A podcaster has decided to ruin my life, so I’m buying a chicken.”
― Amy Tintera, Listen for the Lie

“Love was putting up with someone for fifty years so you’d have someone to bury you when you died. I would know; my family was in the business of death.”
― Ashley Poston, The Dead Romantics

“I said, “The closest I’ve ever got to flying is going downhill on a bike when I’m drunk.” “Very dangerous.” “Want a go?” “Yes.”
― Kaliane Bradley, The Ministry of Time

“You know what I think the trick to dealing with family is? I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.” “What?” I said, spreading strawberry jam on my toast. “Marrying your best friend.” He wiped his mouth with a napkin. “You marry your best friend, and at family gatherings you deal with your shitty relatives together. You laugh about it and have each other’s backs. Share looks and text each other from across the room when everyone else is being an asshole. And nobody else really matters because you have your own universe.”
― Abby Jimenez, The Friend Zone