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Narrative Practice - Many stories - “Problem-saturated story” -> preferred stories - Reauthor - Externalization: Naming the Problem, Not Becoming the Problem - Emotional distance: “Princess Poopy Pants”
Cultural Appropriation disclaimer
Self-help - Wanting to feel different vs better understanding self and others
-------------- Chapter 1: The Drama Triangle -------------- Special cases: - Persecutor: including righteous victim - Rescuer: Avoid victim or persecutor
Why so much Drama? - Adrenaline rush - Heightened threat response (abuse, neglect, trauma) - Only learned experience - Societal conditioning (politics, stories) - Short-term gains (+harms to self and others): +- Victim: avoid responsibility, sympathy +- Persecutor: power, moral superiority, control +- Rescuer: value and purpose; appreciation and gratitude - Lack of safety net - Storytelling - Tied to flight/flight/freeze/fawn +- Rescuing can be flight from own issues +- Fawn can be over acomodating
Who starts the triangle? Any of the roles
Getting off the Drama Triangle: - Self-awareness: Awareness of archetypes, emotional+physical cues, thoughts+stories, role, triggers, impact - Self-regulation: breathing, grounding, shaking, stretching, etc. - Self-accountability +- Own participation: cause, contribute, condone) +- Persecutor -> Assertive advocate +- Victim -> Conscious participant +- Rescuer -> Attuned Supporter
-------------- Chapter 2: Getting to Know your Shame Triangle -------------- Inner Critic - Mapping the effects +- Origins? +- Frequency? +- How it manifests? +- Go-to phrases? +- Strategies? +- Emotional impact? +- Navigating Emotional Suppression? +- Self-perception? +- Behavioral impact? - Taking it in "Taking a stand" - Moments of power over inner critic - Externalizing +- Characterization +- Size and Distance +- Genre shift +- Voice Alteration
Shame "A partner's constructive feedback, reasonable requests or legitimate expressions of need are misinterpreted as criticisms, leading to defensive reactions that divert attention from addressing the core issues at hand"
- Mapping the effects +- Origins +- Frequency +- How Shame manifests +- Shame's strategies +- Emotional Impact +- Self-perception +- Behavioral impact +- Relationship effects +- Distinguishing between toxic narratives and valuable emotions - Taking it in "Taking a stand" - Moments of power over shame - Externalizing +- Characterization +- Size and Distance +- Genre shift +- Voice Alteration
Escapers - Mapping the effects +- The Impact of the inner critic and shame on your escapers +- The overfunctioning escaper +- The underfunctioning escaper +- Aggression as an escaper response +- Impact of Escapers - Taking it in "Taking a stand" - Moments of power over your escapers - Externalizing +- Characterization +- Size and Distance +- Genre shift +- Voice Alteration...more
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