JGV

“Although Seuss is one of the most beloved children authors ever, he had a phobia of kids.”
― James Egan, 1000 Facts about Historic Figures Vol. 2

“Y’know,” I said, holding my palms out. “That one bad egg ruins the bunch!” Maddie put her face in her palm. “You’re thinking of apples. One bad apple ruins the bunch.”
― Marcus Emerson, Secret Agent 6th Grader: 3 Book Box Set Collection (a hilarious adventure for children ages 9-12): From the Creator of Diary of a 6th Grade Ninja

“hoped that would be the last time they would see that one. He blew out a breath. “I think I know why those goats ran right off the cliff into the lava.”  “Oh? Why?” Mom asked.  “Because they didn’t see the ewe-turn sign.” He wiggled his eyebrows.  “OH NO!” Kate groaned. “Not again!”  “Don’t mind me, I’m only kid-ding,” Dad said, wiggling his eyebrows even harder.  “Oh maaaaan,” Jack said. “Honey,” Mom said, “I don’t think the kids are interested in your jokes right now.”  “Okay, I’ll stop,” Dad said with a sigh. Mom patted him on the shoulder and Dad looked at her. “I would hate to butt heads with you over it.”  Jack and Kate both burst out laughing and Mom rolled her eyes. “Now kids, no butting in!” Dad said, pointing his finger at them. The kids laughed even harder and Mom chuckled too. Dad put his hands on his hips. “You have goat to be kidding me! I said NO butting in!”  The kids were laughing bigly now, and Mom had a big grin on her face. Their spirits had been lifted, even if only a little. Mom squeezed Dad’s hand. “I love you, honey.”  Dad squeezed hers back. “We already did the bee jokes, dear.” He winked.”
― Pixel Ate, The Accidental Minecraft Family: Book 13

“FishyBoi was as strange as his name. He had pale blue eyes that looked almost white. Under the right conditions, he might have been mistaken for Herobrine. In addition to his standard diamond armor and diamond sword, he had a pet parrot named Awesome. The parrot talked, a lot. It liked to mostly talk about itself. “I’m Awesome, braahk!” “You’re not, braahk!” “Awesome, braahk. Not, braahk.”
― Dr. Block, The Ballad of Winston the Wandering Trader, Book 13