Erin

“I want a man who is sunny-side up, with a large sausage, and two hot buns.”
― Sierra Cartwright, With This Collar

“Hi, pot. It’s me, kettle,” Sophia snapped back.
“Hi kettle, you have about thirty seconds before this pot kicks your ass.”
― Alice Clayton, Wallbanger

“The first thing I saw was blue. Blue sweater, blue eyes. Blue. Beautifully blue. Then I saw red as I recognized who belonged to the blue.

“Fucking Wallbanger,” I hissed, frozen on the spot.

His grin slid off as well as he played place-the-face for a moment.

“Fucking Pink Nightie Girl,” he finally concluded. He grimaced.

We stared, seething as the air literally turned electric between us, snapping and crackling.

The four behind us had fallen silent, listening to this little interchange. Then they caught up.

“That’s Wallbanger?” Sophia screeched.

“Wait a minute, that’s Pink Nightie Girl?” Neil laughed, and Mimi and Ryan snorted.

My face flamed bright red as I processed this information, and Simon’s sneer became that damnable smirk I’d seen that night in the hallway—when I’d banged on his door and made him quit giving it to the Giggler and yelled at him. When I’d been wearing…

“Pink Nightie Girl. Pink Nightie Girl!” I choked out, beyond pissed. Beyond angry. Well into Furious Town. I stared at him, pouring all of my tension into that one look. All of the sleepless nights and lost Os and cold showers and banana thrusting and merciless wet dreams went into that one look.

I wanted to level him with my eyes, make him beg for mercy. But no…Not Simon, Director of the International House Of Orgasms.

He

Was

Still

Smirking.”
― Alice Clayton, Wallbanger

“The beginnings of carpal tunnel were threatening to set in as I tried desperately to get myself off. But O was on seemingly permanent hiatus. And I don’t mean Oprah.”
― Alice Clayton, Wallbanger