Michael

“She did know that once tattooed one could no longer expect to lie for all eternity in an orthodox Jewish cemetery. They wouldn't even bury women with pierced ears. A strange theory of mutilation from the people who invented cutting the skin off the pee-pee.”
― Tom Robbins, Still Life with Woodpecker

“I asked Mr. Wrangle what you were like. He said you were hornet juice and rosebuds in a container of gazelle meat.”
― Tom Robbins, Still Life with Woodpecker

“The correspondent wondered ingenuously how in the name of all that was sane could there be people who thought it amusing to row a boat. It was not an amusement; it was a diabolical punishment, and even a genius of mental aberrations could never conclude that it was anything but a horror to the muscles and a crime against the back.”
― Stephen Crane, Open Boat

“Most people do not have the guts to direct their own movie - let alone star in it.”
― Tom Robbins