Nate

“She was Christian but American Christian, the kind that believed Jesus had just needed a bigger gun.”
― Kaveh Akbar, Martyr!

“A year and a half ago in early recovery, Cyrus told his AA sponsor Gabe that he believed himself to be a fundamentally bad person. Selfish, self-seeking. Cruel, even. A drunk horse thief who stops drinking is just a sober horse thief, Cyrus'd said, feeling proud to have thought it. He'd use versions of that line later in two different poems.

"But you're not a bad person trying to get good. You're a sick person trying to get well," Gabe responded.

Cyrus sat with the thought. Gabe went on,
"There's no difference to the outside world between a good guy and a bad guy behaving like a good guy. In fact, I think God loves that second guy a little more."

"Good-person drag," Cyrus thought out loud. That's what they called it after that.”
― Kaveh Akbar, Martyr!

“When people think about travelling to the past, they do it with this wild sense of self-importance. Like, ‘gosh, I better not step on that flower or my grandfather will never be born.’ But in the present we mow our lawns and poison ants and skip parties and miss birthdays all the time. We never think of the effects of that stuff… Nobody thinks of now as the future past.”
― Kaveh Akbar, Martyr!

“My God, I just remembered that we die. But—but me too?! Don’t forget that for now, it’s strawberry season. —Clarice Lispector”
― Kaveh Akbar, Martyr!