David Couvillon

“Will I ever go back to the way I was?” “Yes. And no.” He spoke evenly, careful not to let any emotion into his voice, just laying it out for her. “After a while, you’ll think about it less often. It won’t monopolize your mind. But will you ever be the same? No, not exactly. You’ve seen combat. That changes you. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing or a good thing. It’s just part of who you are.”
― J.T. Baier, Ghost Agent

“Cato did not consider himself a brave individual. He could already feel the unsettled flutters in the pit of his stomach and the cold sweat pricking out down his spine. He wondered why he had not become used to it after so many years of fighting. What was it in him that preyed on his mind, thrusting forward terrifying images from past battles as well as imagined scenes of dreadful vividness? For Cato it seemed that there were two sides of his being locked in a perpetual struggle. The Cato he wanted to be - courageous, bold and respected, unburdened by self-doubt - and that other, truer, version - fearful, anxious and agonisingly sensitive to the view other people had of him. The latter could only ever act out the role of the former, winning the applause of the moment, before withdrawing into the shabby robes of his real nature. The thought sickened him”
― Simon Scarrow, The Legion