Sebastian

“There is an African fly that lays its eggs in the jelly of children's eyes, the hatching larvae blinding them by feeding on the eye itself. But the fly has no quarrel with the child. It is merely following its nature.
Likewise, Boris Johnson, a vile grub laying his horrible eggs in the soft jelly of the EU debate, has no agenda beyond his own advancement. He believes in nothing, and neither does his spiritual soulmate, the eye-scoffing African fly.”
― Stewart Lee, March of the Lemmings: Brexit in Print and Performance 2016–2019

“Blessed are those who yodel - for they shall never be troubled by offers of work.”
― Billy Connolly, Windswept & Interesting: My Autobiography

“Where do dreams end, where does reality begin? Dreams come from within, they trickle in from the world that we all have inside us, possibly distorted, but what isn’t distorted, what isn’t dented? I love you today, hate you tomorrow—he who never changes is lying to the world.”
― Jón Kalman Stefánsson, Hjarta mannsins

“And since January I have been wearing four or five new pairs of pants a day, all of which will eventually take pride of place, when suitably soiled, in vending machines on the streets of Tokyo's most fashionable districts.
My wife, of course, finds this turn of events ridiculous, but she will be laughing on the other side of her stupid face when the flyblown briefs she currently uses as dishcloths become priceless collector's items.”
― Stewart Lee, March of the Lemmings: Brexit in Print and Performance 2016–2019