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“It wasn't the sort of horniness that lingered only in my cunt. I efficiently dealt with that sort after a session with my vibrator. It was the horniness of looking out into the horizon and knowing I wouldn’t get fucked anytime soon.”
― The Temptation of Eden
― The Temptation of Eden
“See," she said,
"I can hold on to you while everything else changes."
And she thought she was safe
and so, in that safety, could face whatever was
to come.
And then all of a sudden that you is gone--
that person, that family, that home,
that job (maybe even that occupation), maybe even
that country, that world--
and there's nothing to hold onto at all,
and that self, that life, is gone as well,
and yet more self--truer self--than ever before.
And how can that all be so true
at the same time?
And yet it is.”
―
"I can hold on to you while everything else changes."
And she thought she was safe
and so, in that safety, could face whatever was
to come.
And then all of a sudden that you is gone--
that person, that family, that home,
that job (maybe even that occupation), maybe even
that country, that world--
and there's nothing to hold onto at all,
and that self, that life, is gone as well,
and yet more self--truer self--than ever before.
And how can that all be so true
at the same time?
And yet it is.”
―
“I imagine giving up. No more peering through windows, mourning the loss of a life that could never again be mine. No more hopeless desire. No more uncertain future. No more terror.”
― The Stolen Heir
― The Stolen Heir
“I read later that feeling like you are dead can have its mechanical cause in certain kinds of brain damage, such as the kind I've endured from chemotherapy. I'm a ghost, but my loss of me isn't even metaphysical - it's mechanical. Yet the rational explanation of why I feel dead half the time does little to mediate the irrational horror of existing in a way that I feel I don't exist. Here we are, here I am, alone and myself, half of me falling off, half of us gone, and all of us as ghosts or the undying ones, half of us dead and half of myself nowhere to be remembered or to be found.”
― The Undying
― The Undying
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