ola

“An alcoholic will steal your wallet and lie to you. A drug addict will steal your wallet and then help you look for it.”
― David Sheff, Beautiful Boy: A Father's Journey Through His Son's Addiction

“But you know, I don’t think I will be so scared to die. I think it’s like today: the end of a vacation when you are ready to go home.”
― David Sheff, Beautiful Boy: A Heartbreaking Memoir of a Father's Struggle with His Son's Addiction and the Journey to Recovery

“I see Nic on the plane. I see him as he is - frail, opaque, ill - my beloved son, my beautiful boy.
"Everything," I say to him.
"Everything."
Fortunately there is a beautiful boy.
Unfortunately he has a terrible disease.
Fortunately there is love and joy.
Unfortunately there is pain and misery.
Fortunately the story is not over.”
― David Sheff, Beautiful Boy: A Father's Journey Through His Son's Addiction

“It is also then that I wish I believed in some sort of life after life, that in another universe, maybe on a small red planet where we have not legs but tails, where we paddle through the atmosphere like seals, where the air itself is sustenance, composed of trillions of molecules of protein and sugar and all one has to do is open one's mouth and inhale in order to remain alive and healthy, maybe you two are there together, floating through the climate. Or maybe he is closer still: maybe he is that gray cat that has begun to sit outside our neighbor's house, purring when I reach out my hand to it; maybe he is that new puppy I see tugging at the end of my other neighbor's leash; maybe he is that toddler I saw running through the square a few months ago, shrieking with joy, his parents huffing after him; maybe he is that flower that suddenly bloomed on the rhododendron bush I thought had died long ago; maybe he is that cloud, that wave, that rain, that mist. It isn't only that he died, or how he died; it is what he died believing. And so I try to be kind to everything I see, and in everything I see, I see him.”
― Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life