Aleksei Fetisov

“How long have you been a Wiccan?'
'A what?'
'A pagan. A witch.'
'I'm not a witch,' I said, glancing out the door. 'I'm a wizard.'
Sanya frowned. 'What is the difference?'
'Wizard has a Z'
He looked at me blankly.
'No one appreciates me.' I muttered.”
― Jim Butcher, Death Masks

“So we get a plan," I said. "Any suggestions?"

"Blow up the building," Kincaid said without looking up. "That works good for vampires. Then soak what's left in gasoline. Set it on fire. Then blow it all up again."

"For future reference, I was sort of hoping for a suggestion that didn't sound like it came from that Bolshevik Muppet with all the dynamite.”
― Jim Butcher, Blood Rites

“Maybe,” he said in a slow, rural drawl, “you could explain to me why I found you in the middle of an orgy.”
“Well,” I said, “if you’re going to be in an orgy, the middle is the best spot, isn’t it.”
― Jim Butcher, Hex Appeal

“Sometimes I forget how much I like riding the bike."

Most chicks do," I said. "Roar of the engine and so on."

Murphy's blue eyes glittered with annoyance and anticipation. "Pig. You really enjoy dropping all women together in the same demographic, don't you?"

It's not my fault all women like motorcycles, Murph. They're basically huge vibrators. With wheels.”
― Jim Butcher, Blood Rites