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“The key to being humorous is being wealthy. The richer you are, the funnier you are to women, and no matter what you say they'll be laughing and giggling.”
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
“Some men fight men. Other men fight fires. As for me, I prefer to get both to do my cooking for me.”
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
“Who doesn't love the smell of gasoline? That's why I decided to make it into a scent for my handcrafted soap. You can use it in the shower, or you can melt it down and use it to fuel your car if things with Iran continue to escalate.”
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
“Modern appliances have lifespans rivaling luna moths. Why buy something today that will need to be replaced in a week? Call me old-fashioned, but I want a washer and dryer that at least have the longevity of a fruit fly.”
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
“I love when I shake a mustard bottle really well and go to squirt a line on my hotdog and out spurts a yellow watery substance. They should sell that as an energy drink, because it really gets me amped up.”
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
― Whenever you're here, I'm there for you
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Dennis’s 2025 Year in Books
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