Lencas

“And yet he sometimes wondered if he could ever love anyone as much as he loved Jude. It was the fact of him, of course, but also the utter comfort of life with him, of having someone who had known him for so long and who could be relied upon to always take him as exactly who he was on that particular day. His work, his very life, was one of disguises and charades. Everything about him and his context was constantly changing: his hair, his body, where he would sleep that night. He often felt he was made of something liquid, something that was being continually poured from bright-colored bottle to bright-colored bottle, with a little being lost or left behind with each transfer. But his friendship with Jude made him feel that there was something real and immutable about who he was, that despite his life of guises, there was something elemental about him, something that Jude saw even when he could not, as if Jude's very witness of him made him real.”
― Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life

“I have become lost to the world / In which i otherwise wasted so much time.”
― Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life

“he feels he isn’t so much living as he is merely existing,”
― Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life

“Jude had smiled at him. "Oh, dying," he said dismissively. We're all dying. He just knew his death would come sooner than he had planned. But that doesn't mean they weren't happy years, that it wasn't a happy life.”
― Hanya Yanagihara, A Little Life