Abby Pickus

“Chivalry looks good on you, ma'alor," he said, brushing a dark curl out of Robb's face. "And I hate that I like it."
"Your flattery will only get you so far," Robb joked, trying to grin, but it turned sour and bitter. "I like you, but I have no right to say that. For what my mother did--for what I did. But...if there was a way for you to forgive me, no matter how long it takes, would you let me? Will you let me try to be worthy of you?"
The question took Jax by surprise.
He sat back, quite unable to find a response.
I've seen you stars, he wanted to say, and this is impossible.
All his life he'd thought that all fates flowed in a continuous, never-ending river, but now the current was disrupted, the path unsettled. They had changed the stars, and he was falling in love with a boy who should have died.
Robb shifted, uncomfortable. "Or--or if you don't feel the same way--"
"I'm sorry," Jax began, but when he looked into Robb's eyes, there were tears there. Alarmed, he quickly added, "No, no! That's not what I meant! I don't mean--"
"I knew you wouldn't. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Tears curved down Robb's cheeks, and almost exasperated, Jax wiped them away.
"I can't LIE, you insufferable Ironblood," he chided. "I'm apologizing because I can't forgive you right now, but that doesn't mean I don't want to kiss you, ma'alor. And it doesn't mean I don't like you. I do. I like you, but do you really want ME? Someone who can't touch other people? That's my reality. I'll never kiss you without seeing your fate. I'll never touch you without seeing how you'll die. Am I someone you could be happy with?"
Robb's brow furrowed. "Screw fate. I'll tear down the stars for you."
For HIM? Even though Jax had to wear gloves, and could never brush his lips against Robb's jawline without seeing the stars, never kiss Robb's ears, or traced the lines of his body, or feel the heat that pulsed just beneath his skin, hot and red and wanting. Jax felt his throat tighten as tears pooled at the edges of his eyes. He didn't cry. He never cried.
Robb took Jax's hand, and kissed his gloved knuckles. "And lucky for you," Robb added, "I'm not planning to ever die, so you don't have to worry about my stars."
He laughed. "You make being mad at you hard, ma'alor."
"I plan on making it impossible," replied Robb, and raised an eyebrow. "What does ma'alor mean?"
Jax chewed on his bottom lip. 'It means..." But he couldn't bear that sort of embarrassment, so he simply leaned into the Ironblood and kissed him. Savoring the moment, the unknowingness of it all.
Until new images came flooding across his senses like a wave of darkness across the stars.”
― Ashley Poston, Heart of Iron

“Jax took Robb by the face, fingers spreading into his hair, dark curls wrapping around his fingers, snarling them, so Robb could look at no one else. He memorized the constellation of freckles crossing Robb's nose, peppering his sun-kissed cheeks. The way the human boy looked at him made a strange, burning feeling turn in his stomach. He wanted to kiss off the freckles and place them in the sky as guiding stars.”
― Ashley Poston, Heart of Iron

“The Solani have a saying," he said, his voice soft. "Al gat ha astri ke'eto. It means something like 'Until the next star shines on you'--until we meet again. So, Al gat ha astri ke'eto, ma'alor.”
― Ashley Poston, Heart of Iron

“He set his chin on her head. "I am sorry, I am so sorry," he repeated, feeling her tears dampening his uniform shoulder.
"Why are YOU sorry? I was the one who wanted to sneak onto that ship. I was the one who led you into danger. I KILLED you--"
He pushed her away from him. "No," he said, looking into her eyes so she would understand. "I went because I wanted to."
"You went because you ALWAYS go," she argued, "and I always lead you into trouble."
"Because I will follow you anywhere," he insisted. "To the ends of the galaxy, if I have to. I want to exist where you exist, and that is enough.”
― Ashley Poston, Heart of Iron