Nevaeh V.

“I took the note out and read it as a reminder of what she'd actually been like and how little she cared about me. It helped. Rejection, I have found, can be the only antidote to delusion.”
― Ottessa Moshfegh, My Year of Rest and Relaxation

“Was the world crumbling? Calm, calm, I told myself. I could feel gravity sucking me deeper, time accelerating, the darkness around me, widening until I was somewhere else, somewhere with no horizon, an area of space that awed me in is foreverness, and I felt calm for just a moment. Then I recognized that I was floating without a tether. I tried to scream but I couldn't. I was afraid. The fear felt like desire: suddenly I wanted to go back and be in all the places I'd ever been, every street I'd walked down, every room I'd sat down in. I wanted to see it all again. I tried to remember my life, flipping through Polaroids in my mind. "It was so pretty there. It was interesting!" But I knew that even if I could go back, if such a thing were possible with exactitude, in life or in dreams, there was really no point. And then I felt desperately lonely.”
― Ottessa Moshfegh, My Year of Rest and Relaxation

“I love you.” Maybe she did, and that’s why I hated her.”
― Ottessa Moshfegh, My Year of Rest and Relaxation

“I’m overwhelmed, I guess. It's been hard, but also sort of beautiful in this sad and peaceful way. You know what she said before she died? She said, 'Don't worry so much trying to be everybody's favorite. Just go have fun.’ That really hit me,
'everybody's favorite.' Because it's true. I do feel the pressure to be like that. Do you think I'm like that? I guess I just never felt good enough. This is probably healthy for me, to have to face life now, you know, on my own.”
― Ottessa Moshfegh, My Year of Rest and Relaxation