David

“People don't like change. But make the change fast enough and you go from one type of normal to another.”
― Terry Pratchett, Making Money

“I only steal because my dear old family needs the money to live!"
Locke Lamora made this proclamation with his wine glass held high; he and the other Gentleman Bastards were seated at the old witchwood table. . . . The others began to jeer.
"Liar!" they chorused
"I only steal because this wicked world won't let me work an honest trade!" Calo cried, hoisting his own glass.
"LIAR!"
"I only steal," said Jean, "because I've temporarily fallen in with bad company."
"LIAR!"
At last the ritual came to Bug; the boy raised his glass a bit shakily and yelled, "I only steal because it's heaps of fucking fun!"
"BASTARD!”
― Scott Lynch, The Lies of Locke Lamora

“I commend my soul to any god that can find it.”
― Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

“Students, eh? Love 'em or hate 'em, you can't hit them with a shovel!”
― Terry Pratchett, Making Money