184 books
—
94 voters
Never let your thoughts past your tongue; never let a competitor know what you really think of him.”
“Luckier rain fell on upland sheep, or whispered gently over forests, or pattered somewhat incestuously into the sea. Rain that fell on Ankh-Morpork, though, was rain that was in trouble. They did terrible things to water, in Ankh-Morpork. Being drunk was only the start of its problems.”
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― Guards! Guards!
“The relevant equation is: Knowledge = power = energy = matter = mass; a good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read.”
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― Guards! Guards!
“Vimes shrugged. “That’s it, then,” he said, and turned away. “Throw the book at him, Carrot.” “Right, sir.” Vimes remembered too late. Dwarfs have trouble with metaphors. They also have a very good aim. The Laws and Ordinances of Ankh and Morpork caught the secretary on the forehead.”
― Guards! Guards!
― Guards! Guards!
“Line of AuNor, dragon bold
Flows to me from days of old,
And through years lost in the mist
My blood names a famous list.
By Air, by Water, by Fire, by Earth
In pride I claim a noble birth.
From EmLar Gray, a deadly deed
By his flame Urlant was freed,
Of fearsome hosts of blighters dark
And took his reward: a golden ark!
My Mother’s sire knew battle well
Before him nine-score villages fell.
When AuRye Red coursed the sky
Elven arrows in vain would fly,
He broke the ranks of men at will
In glittering mines dwarves he’d kill.
Grandsire he is through Father’s blood
A river of strength in fullest flood.
My egg was one of Irelia’s Clutch
Her wisdom passed in mental touch.
Mother took up before ever I woke
The parent dragon’s heavy yoke;
For me, her son, she lost her life
Murderous dwarves brought blackened knife.
A father I had in the Bronze AuRel
Hunter of renown upon wood and fell
He gave his clutch through lessons hard
A chance at life beyond his guard.
Father taught me where, and when, and how
To fight or flee, so I sing now.
Wistala, sibling, brilliant green
Escaped with me the axes keen
We hunted as pair, made our kill
From stormy raindrops drank our fill
When elves and dwarves took after us
I told her “Run,” and lost her thus.
Bound by ropes; by Hazeleye freed
And dolphin-rescued in time of need
I hid among men with fishing boats
On island thick with blown sea-oats
I became a drake and breathed first fire
When dolphin-slaughter aroused my ire.
I ran with wolves of Blackhard’s pack
Killed three hunters on my track
The Dragonblade’s men sought my hide
But I escaped through a fangèd tide
Of canine friends, assembled Thing
Then met young Djer, who cut collar-ring.
I crossed the steppes with dwarves of trade
On the banks of the Vhydic Ironriders slayed
Then sought out NooMoahk, dragon black
And took my Hieba daughter back
To find her kind; then took first flight
Saw NooMoahk buried in honor right.
When war came to friends I long had known
My path was set, my heart was stone
I sought the source of dreadful hate
And on this Isle I met my fate
Found Natasatch in a cavern deep
So I had one more promise to keep.
To claim this day my life’s sole mate
In future years to share my fate
A dragon’s troth is this day pledged
To she who’ll see me fully fledged.
Through this dragon’s life, as dragon-dame
shall add your blood to my family’s fame.”
― Dragon Champion
Flows to me from days of old,
And through years lost in the mist
My blood names a famous list.
By Air, by Water, by Fire, by Earth
In pride I claim a noble birth.
From EmLar Gray, a deadly deed
By his flame Urlant was freed,
Of fearsome hosts of blighters dark
And took his reward: a golden ark!
My Mother’s sire knew battle well
Before him nine-score villages fell.
When AuRye Red coursed the sky
Elven arrows in vain would fly,
He broke the ranks of men at will
In glittering mines dwarves he’d kill.
Grandsire he is through Father’s blood
A river of strength in fullest flood.
My egg was one of Irelia’s Clutch
Her wisdom passed in mental touch.
Mother took up before ever I woke
The parent dragon’s heavy yoke;
For me, her son, she lost her life
Murderous dwarves brought blackened knife.
A father I had in the Bronze AuRel
Hunter of renown upon wood and fell
He gave his clutch through lessons hard
A chance at life beyond his guard.
Father taught me where, and when, and how
To fight or flee, so I sing now.
Wistala, sibling, brilliant green
Escaped with me the axes keen
We hunted as pair, made our kill
From stormy raindrops drank our fill
When elves and dwarves took after us
I told her “Run,” and lost her thus.
Bound by ropes; by Hazeleye freed
And dolphin-rescued in time of need
I hid among men with fishing boats
On island thick with blown sea-oats
I became a drake and breathed first fire
When dolphin-slaughter aroused my ire.
I ran with wolves of Blackhard’s pack
Killed three hunters on my track
The Dragonblade’s men sought my hide
But I escaped through a fangèd tide
Of canine friends, assembled Thing
Then met young Djer, who cut collar-ring.
I crossed the steppes with dwarves of trade
On the banks of the Vhydic Ironriders slayed
Then sought out NooMoahk, dragon black
And took my Hieba daughter back
To find her kind; then took first flight
Saw NooMoahk buried in honor right.
When war came to friends I long had known
My path was set, my heart was stone
I sought the source of dreadful hate
And on this Isle I met my fate
Found Natasatch in a cavern deep
So I had one more promise to keep.
To claim this day my life’s sole mate
In future years to share my fate
A dragon’s troth is this day pledged
To she who’ll see me fully fledged.
Through this dragon’s life, as dragon-dame
shall add your blood to my family’s fame.”
― Dragon Champion
“There was practically nothing the dragon could do to people that they had not, sooner or later, tried on one another, often with enthusiasm.
You have the effrontery to be squeamish, it thought at him. But we were dragons. We were supposed to be cruel, cunning, heartless, and terrible. But this much I can tell you, you ape, - the great face pressed even closer, so that Wonse was staring into the pitiless depths of his eyes - we never burned and tortured and ripped one another apart and called it morality.”
― Guards! Guards!
You have the effrontery to be squeamish, it thought at him. But we were dragons. We were supposed to be cruel, cunning, heartless, and terrible. But this much I can tell you, you ape, - the great face pressed even closer, so that Wonse was staring into the pitiless depths of his eyes - we never burned and tortured and ripped one another apart and called it morality.”
― Guards! Guards!
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