shivani⁷

“Of course, if you...if you don't want to," he says into the silence, sliding his gaze away from me, "I can accept that. I won't bring it up again. I know I'm not....I know what I'm like. That I'm infuriating. And selfish. And cruel. I know I'm not perfect the way my brother is, and I manage to disappoint my parents every time. It's okay if you don't choose me, really—I never expected to be the first choice. I wouldn't blame you‚—"

"I do choose you."

He doesn't seem to hear me at first. He's still talking, rambling really, the words flowing out like rainwater. "I can't always say pretty things, and sometimes I tease you when really I just want you to look my way, and—wait." He stops. Even his breath freezes in his throat. "What...did you just say? Say it again."

"I choose you," I say quietly, glad for the shadows concealing my flushed cheeks. For the support of the wall behind me.
"You will always be my first choice, Julius Gong.”
― Ann Liang, I Hope This Doesn't Find You

“You're so weird sometimes," he says, and it somehow sounds more affectionate than I love you.”
― Ann Liang, This Time It's Real

“Maybe I’ll always be scared. Maybe the fear of getting hurt, of being left alone,
will never truly go away. But even if it’s my default setting, I can fight it. So many beautiful things lie on the other side of fear.
Like love.
Like this.”
― Ann Liang, This Time It's Real

“I finish underlining the date with my ruler so it's perfectly straight. This is like my version of drugs.”
― Ann Liang, I Hope This Doesn't Find You