David Lawson

“Wooo!’ he said, slamming his shot glass down and coughing a bit. ‘That’s good stuff.’
I agreed heartily. ‘Shall we do another one?’ I asked.
‘Oh no,’ Jesus said quietly, his eyes growing round. ‘This is one of those situations where I have to stop and ask myself, what would I do?”
― Kevin Hearne, Hammered

“I think this man might actually possess supernatural powers. He makes people lose their minds and I’m sure some of them do lose bladder control as well."

"I see. And who is this author"

"Neil Fucking Gaiman."

"His second name is Fucking?"

"No Leif that’s the honorary second name all celebrities are given by their fans. It’s not an insult it’s a huge compliment and he’s earned it.”
― Kevin Hearne, Hammered

“I think "The Boondock Saints", because the Irish guys win. Plus the cat ends badly. It affirms my worldview and I feel validated.”
― Kevin Hearne, Hammered

“I'd have to ask Oberon to leave him a present on his front doorstep. He'd do it camouflaged too, so that even if Mr. Semerdjian was watching - and he probably would be - it would appear to be undeniable, physical evidence that, sometimes, shit just happens.”
― Kevin Hearne, Hounded