Caroline

“This tee features a jumble of Scrabble tiles with the tagline, “I just bought this book at IKEA.”
― Trixie Silvertale, Tattoos and Clues

“Is this a Mexican standoff? Actually, no. If my movie knowledge serves me, a Mexican standoff requires three people—one of whom must be Salma Hayek.”
― Trixie Silvertale, Fries and Alibis

“Suddenly one day I sprouted boobs. Not *just* boobs. Enormous boobs. When puberty finally struck, I developed faster than a Polaroid. In my mind at least, I remember going to bed flat as a board one night and waking up with ginormous breasts the next morning. It was like, whoa, dude - this is better than the tooth fairy!”
― Cassandra Peterson, Yours Cruelly, Elvira: Memoirs of the Mistress of the Dark

“The house and all its problems had taken its toll on your mother and me. We could feel ourselves drifting apart a little more each day. The spark had gone out of our marriage, and we desperately needed to get it back. To do this, we decided to have a "date night", which is a polite way of saying we rented a room at the Two Pines with the intention of fucking like teenagers.”
― Riley Sager, Home Before Dark