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“Yeah. I’m an asshole. But I promise you, when the shit rolls downhill and you need someone with a shovel, I’m an asshole who can get the job done.”
― Gabriel's Fire
― Gabriel's Fire
“Nobody ever remembers the weather, so they always complain about it being hot in summer and cold in winter.”
― Celestial Magic
― Celestial Magic
“I am old now, or at least I'm no longer young. And everything I see reminds me of something else I've seen such that I see nothing for the first time. A bonny girl, her hair fiery red, reminds me only of another hundred such lasses I've seen and their mothers and what they were when they grew and what they looked like when they died. It is the curse of age that all things are reflections of other things.”
― The Truth Is a Cave in the Black Mountains
― The Truth Is a Cave in the Black Mountains
“They had been in Ankh-Morpork for three days and Granny was beginning to enjoy herself, much to her surprise. She had found them lodgings in The Shades, an ancient part of the city whose inhabitants were largely nocturnal and never enquired about one another's business because curiosity not only killed the cat but threw it in the river with weights tied to its feet. The lodgings were on the top floor next to the well-guarded premises of a respectable dealer in stolen property because, as Granny had heard, good fences make good neighbours.”
― Equal Rites
― Equal Rites
“It looked like every cartoon of a flying saucer Newt had ever seen.
As he stared over the top of his map, a door in the saucer slid aside with a satisfying whoosh, revealing a gleaming walkway which extended automatically down to the road. Brilliant blue light shone out, outlining three alien shapes. They walked down the ramp. At least, two of them walked. The one that looked like a pepper pot just skidded down it, and fell over at the bottom.
The other two ignored its frantic beeping and walked over to the car quite slowly, in the worldwide approved manner of policemen already compiling the charge sheet it their heads. The tallest one, a yellow toad dressed in kitchen foil, rapped on Newt's window. He wound it down. The thing was wearing the kind of mirror-finished sunglasses that Newt always thought of as Cool Hand Luke shades.
'Morning, sir or madam or neuter,' the thing said. 'This your planet, is it?'
The other alien, which was stubby and green, had wandered off into the woods by the side of the road. Out of the corner of his eye Newt saw it kick a tree, and then run a leaf through some complicated gadget on its belt. It didn't look very pleased.
'Well, yes. I suppose so.' he said.
The toad stared thoughtfully at the skyline.
'Had it long, have we, sir?' it said.
'Er. Not personally. I mean, as a species, about half a million years. I think.'
The alien exchanged glances with its colleague. 'Been letting the old acid rain build up, haven't we, sir?' it said. 'Been letting ourselves go a bit with the old hydrocarbons, perhaps?'
'I'm sorry.'
'Could you tell me your planet's albedo, sir?' said the the toad, still staring levelly at the horizon as though it was doing something interesting.
'Er. No.'
'Well, I'm sorry to have to tell you, sir, that your polar ice caps are below regulation size for a planet of this category, sir.'
'Oh, dear,' said Newt. He was wondering who he could tell about this, and realizing that there was absolutely no one who would believe him. [...]
The small alien walked past the car.
'CO2 level up 0.5 percent,' it rasped, giving him a meaningful look. 'You do know you could find yourself charged with being a dominant species while under the influence of impulse-driven consumerism, don't you?”
― Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch
As he stared over the top of his map, a door in the saucer slid aside with a satisfying whoosh, revealing a gleaming walkway which extended automatically down to the road. Brilliant blue light shone out, outlining three alien shapes. They walked down the ramp. At least, two of them walked. The one that looked like a pepper pot just skidded down it, and fell over at the bottom.
The other two ignored its frantic beeping and walked over to the car quite slowly, in the worldwide approved manner of policemen already compiling the charge sheet it their heads. The tallest one, a yellow toad dressed in kitchen foil, rapped on Newt's window. He wound it down. The thing was wearing the kind of mirror-finished sunglasses that Newt always thought of as Cool Hand Luke shades.
'Morning, sir or madam or neuter,' the thing said. 'This your planet, is it?'
The other alien, which was stubby and green, had wandered off into the woods by the side of the road. Out of the corner of his eye Newt saw it kick a tree, and then run a leaf through some complicated gadget on its belt. It didn't look very pleased.
'Well, yes. I suppose so.' he said.
The toad stared thoughtfully at the skyline.
'Had it long, have we, sir?' it said.
'Er. Not personally. I mean, as a species, about half a million years. I think.'
The alien exchanged glances with its colleague. 'Been letting the old acid rain build up, haven't we, sir?' it said. 'Been letting ourselves go a bit with the old hydrocarbons, perhaps?'
'I'm sorry.'
'Could you tell me your planet's albedo, sir?' said the the toad, still staring levelly at the horizon as though it was doing something interesting.
'Er. No.'
'Well, I'm sorry to have to tell you, sir, that your polar ice caps are below regulation size for a planet of this category, sir.'
'Oh, dear,' said Newt. He was wondering who he could tell about this, and realizing that there was absolutely no one who would believe him. [...]
The small alien walked past the car.
'CO2 level up 0.5 percent,' it rasped, giving him a meaningful look. 'You do know you could find yourself charged with being a dominant species while under the influence of impulse-driven consumerism, don't you?”
― Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch
Elke’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Elke’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
513 books
|
43 friends
3,701 books
|
332 friends
336 books
|
72 friends
558 books
|
17 friends
78 books
|
856 friends
0 books
|
23 friends
3 books
|
52 friends
61 books
|
24 friends
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