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Jonathan Joseph

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Jonathan is Currently Reading

Jonathan Joseph is currently reading

A Dance with Dragons (A Song of Ice and Fire, #5)

by George R.R. Martin

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Jonathan’s Quotes

“I blame it on Twilight. In real life, vampires only sparkle when they're on fire.”
― Larry Correia, Monster Hunter Vendetta

212 likes

“Fish and Wildlife wants to fine us for killing a giant mutant Tennessee River catfish because it was endangered. Sure it had just crawled up on land and eaten some teenagers, but it was still an endangered species.”
― Larry Correia, Monster Hunter International

87 likes

“Nikolai's a badass Russian. Badass Russians only have three emotions: revenge, depression, and vodka.”
― Larry Correia, Monster Hunter Alpha

127 likes

“If you were me, then I'd be you, and if I were you, then I'd hide somewhere far away.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code

tags: humor

926 likes

“Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can."
Grover cracked a smile. "The dam snack bar?"
Zoe blinked. "Yes. What is funny?"
"Nothing," Grover said, trying to keep a straight face. "I could use some dam french fries."
Even Thalia smiled at that. "And I need to use the dam restroom."
...
I started cracking up, and Thalia and Grover joined in, while Zoe just looked at me. "I do not understand."
"I want to use the dam water fountain," Grover said.
"And..." Thalia tried to catch her breath. "I want to buy a dam t-shirt.”
― Rick Riordan, The Titan’s Curse

tags: humor

9796 likes

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