Lisa Sutton

“CUSTOMER (to their friend): God, the Famous Five titles realy were crap, weren’t they? Five Go Camping. Five Go Off in a Caravan.... If it was Five Go Down To a Crack House it might be a bit more exciting.”
― Jen Campbell, Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops

“CUSTOMER: Do you have security cameras in here? BOOKSELLER: Yes. CUSTOMER: Oh. (customer slides a book out from inside his jacket and places it back on the shelf)”
― Jen Campbell, Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops

“Customer: Where are your fictional novels?”
― Jen Campbell, Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops

“CUSTOMER: These books are really stupid, aren’t they?
BOOKSELLER: Which ones?
CUSTOMER: You know, the ones where animals like cats and mice are best friends.
BOOKSELLER: I suppose they’re not very realistic, but then that’s fiction.
CUSTOMER: They’re more than unrealistic; they’re really stupid.
BOOKSELLER: Well, writers use that kind of thing to teach kids about accepting people different to themselves, you know?
CUSTOMER: Yeah, well, books shouldn’t pretend that different people get on like that and that everything is ‘la de da’ and wonderful, should they? Kids should learn that life’s a bitch, and the sooner the better.”
― Jen Campbell, Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops