Cassie Thompson

“Dave has always equated love with sex. That idea had started early on with pornographic images which wired him a certain way. It was reinforced by guy talk in locker rooms, he played sports in high school and college, and through relationships with women who also defined love as sex. It was all he knew, but as it turned out, most of those women had been sexually abused in ways that disconnected them from their bodies and wired them to be highly sexual. It came out that Maddie was also sexually abused, which Dave didn't know, but she had gone the other way in reaction to that trauma. She didn't enjoy sex. Sex was a device, something she used to attract men, not something that brought her pleasure.”
― John Kim, Single On Purpose: Redefine Everything. Find Yourself First.

“Whatever your opinion of frequent sexual congress, let us assume for the purpose of this study that sensual sex should provide an increase in personal happiness, which was a widely held belief during the era we are discussing. A visual expression of the data we compiled regarding the subject's sexual activity shows happiness decreasing as sexual activity increases.”
― Claire Dederer, Love and Trouble: A Midlife Reckoning

“One day my colleague, David Buss and I were chatting and I said to him, "Nobody's ever looked at why people have sex," says Cindy Meston, psychologist at UTexas Austin and author of the book, 'Why Women Have Sex.' She and Buss rectified that.
1,549 undergraduates settled on 237 reasons for sex. Women listed as their top 10 reasons, (1) I was attracted to the person, (2) I wanted to experience the physical pleasure, (3) It feels good, (4) I wanted to show my affection for the person, (5) I wanted to express my love for the person, (6) I was sexually aroused and wanted the release, (7) It's fun, (8) I was horny, (9) I realized I was in love, and (10) I was in the heat of the moment.
Men had the same top three, with numbers 2 and 3 switched. Lower in the top 10, men mix in - I wanted to achieve orgasm, and, I wanted to please my partner.”
― Garth Sundem, Brain Trust: 93 Top Scientists Reveal Lab-Tested Secrets to Surfing, Dating, Dieting, Gambling, Growing Man-Eating Plants, and More!

“Who cares about another dead white woman in the land of the Lakota?”
― Irvin Weathersby Jr., In Open Contempt: Confronting White Supremacy in Art and Public Space