Cassie Thompson

“With drugs, people almost universally want them more than they end up liking them. With sex it can be the other way around. People can end up liking sex more than they initially wanted it, especially as both men and women get older, and with more time in a relationship.”
― Garth Sundem, Brain Trust: 93 Top Scientists Reveal Lab-Tested Secrets to Surfing, Dating, Dieting, Gambling, Growing Man-Eating Plants, and More!

“Jess herself seemed resolutely asexual, though I later of torrid affairs, and complex intrigues. This quality of holding back was very important for me to see. She'd held herself apart a little. She didn't pretend she wasn't beautiful, there was nothing coy in her, but she wasn't very interested in using her beauty's power. That fascinated me. I had never thought of that as an option. Just letting your beauty lie around, unused. She was a model of a different way of being.”
― Claire Dederer, Love and Trouble: A Midlife Reckoning

“Dave has always equated love with sex. That idea had started early on with pornographic images which wired him a certain way. It was reinforced by guy talk in locker rooms, he played sports in high school and college, and through relationships with women who also defined love as sex. It was all he knew, but as it turned out, most of those women had been sexually abused in ways that disconnected them from their bodies and wired them to be highly sexual. It came out that Maddie was also sexually abused, which Dave didn't know, but she had gone the other way in reaction to that trauma. She didn't enjoy sex. Sex was a device, something she used to attract men, not something that brought her pleasure.”
― John Kim, Single On Purpose: Redefine Everything. Find Yourself First.

“One day my colleague, David Buss and I were chatting and I said to him, "Nobody's ever looked at why people have sex," says Cindy Meston, psychologist at UTexas Austin and author of the book, 'Why Women Have Sex.' She and Buss rectified that.
1,549 undergraduates settled on 237 reasons for sex. Women listed as their top 10 reasons, (1) I was attracted to the person, (2) I wanted to experience the physical pleasure, (3) It feels good, (4) I wanted to show my affection for the person, (5) I wanted to express my love for the person, (6) I was sexually aroused and wanted the release, (7) It's fun, (8) I was horny, (9) I realized I was in love, and (10) I was in the heat of the moment.
Men had the same top three, with numbers 2 and 3 switched. Lower in the top 10, men mix in - I wanted to achieve orgasm, and, I wanted to please my partner.”
― Garth Sundem, Brain Trust: 93 Top Scientists Reveal Lab-Tested Secrets to Surfing, Dating, Dieting, Gambling, Growing Man-Eating Plants, and More!