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“Now every girl is expected to have Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants
“Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants
“I would not trade any of these features for anybody else’s. I wouldn’t trade the small thin-lipped mouth that makes me resemble my nephew. I wouldn’t even trade the acne scar on my right cheek, because that recurring zit spent more time with me in college than any boy ever did.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants
“I was wearing my best Gap turtleneck and my dates were two adult lesbians, so yea, I was pretty cool.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants
“It can’t be said enough. Don’t concern yourself with fashion; stick to simple pieces that flatter your body type. By nineteen, I had found my look. Oversize T-shirts, bike shorts, and wrestling shoes. To prevent the silhouette from being too baggy, I would cinch it at the waist with my fanny pack. I was pretty sure I would wear this look forever. The shirts allowed me to express myself with cool sayings like “There’s No Crying in Baseball” and “Universität Heidelberg,” the bike shorts showed off my muscular legs, and the fanny pack held all my trolley tokens. I was nailing it on a daily basis. Find something like this for yourself as soon as possible.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants
Our Shared Shelf
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— last activity Feb 16, 2026 05:07AM
OUR SHARED SHELF IS CURRENTLY DORMANT AND NOT MANAGED BY EMMA AND HER TEAM. Dear Readers, As part of my work with UN Women, I have started reading ...more
Kinga’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Kinga’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
422 books
|
38 friends
352 books
|
57 friends
36 books
|
80 friends
487 books
|
37 friends
3,076 books
|
271 friends
78 books
|
50 friends
1,754 books
|
11 friends
53 books
|
31 friends
More friends…
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