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“Don't look now, but that's my ex over there."
Surely I'm not the only one who takes "don't look now" as "there's no better time than now." I looked.
"Bad, Ali!" Another slap to my arm. "Bad, bad, bad Ali! Have you no self control?”
― Gena Showalter, Alice in Zombieland

“He ignored me, thank God, saying to Kat, "Let go of Frosty's leash. You're choking the life out of him."
Kat's eyes narrowed to tiny slits, a sure sign of her aggression. "He deserves to choke. He didn't keep little frosty in his pants this summer." the words snapped like a whip.
"He did." Cole snapped back with unwavering confidence.
"Not."
"Did."
"Not!"
"Did,"
"Not, not, not!" she shouted with a stomp of her foot.
"What are we five?" Cole said.
"Six.”
― Gena Showalter, Alice in Zombieland

“Pops: How about you finish this sentence for me, Jason? When a girl says no she means...
Justin, looking desperately at me: No?
Nana: Are you sure?
Justin, shifting uncomfortably: I'm sure. No means no.
Nana: Well look at you. You got one right. Now here's another, even tougher sentence for you to finish. Premarital sex is...
Me: Nana! I'm so sorry Justin.
Nana: Unlike Pops, I'm not moving on. Justin?
Pops: His name is Jason.
Justin:Uh....uh....
Pops: While you think about that, why don't you tell me how you feel about drinking and driving?
Justin: I'm totally against it, I swear!
Nana: Methinks he protests too much.”
― Gena Showalter, Alice in Zombieland

“Should I pull on a shirt?" he asked with hint of amusement. I WILL NOT BLUSH. "No." He'd be doing the world a favor if he never wore a shirt again, but I wasn't going to tell him that part. "You're fine.”
― Gena Showalter, Alice in Zombieland