Forrest Filetti

“Alex decided he’d had enough. He put down his knife. “All right,” he said. “You’ve made it pretty clear that you don’t want to work with me. Well, that’s fine. Because I don’t want to work with you either. And for what it’s worth, nobody would ever believe you were my mom because no mom would ever behave like you.”
“Alex…,” Carver began.
“Forget it! I’m going back to London. And if you’re Mr. Byrne asks why, you can tell him I didn’t like the jelly, so I went home to get some jam.”
― Anthony Horowitz, Skeleton Key

“Braccas meas vescimini!"
I wasn't sure where the Latin came from. I think it meant 'Eat my pants!”
― Rick Riordan, The Lightning Thief

“Doesn't miss many meals, does he?" Zeus muttered. "Tyson, for your bravery in the war, and for leading the Cyclopes, you are appointed a general I. The armies of Olympus. You shall henceforth lead you breathren into war whenever required by the gods. And you shall have a new...um...what kind of weapon would you like? A sword? An axe?"
"Stick!" Tyson said, showing his broken club.
"Very well," Zeus said. "We will grant you a new, er, stick. The best stick that may be found."
"Hooray!”
― Rick Riordan, The Last Olympian

“With great power... comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later.”
― Rick Riordan, The Last Olympian