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“How come someone always saves the people who try to kill themselves and then makes them tell everyone how sorry they are for ruining their evenings?”
― Michael Thomas Ford, Suicide Notes

“Personally, I think they killed the bear because they were afraid of it. That s what people do, kill the things they re afraid of.”
― Michael Thomas Ford, Suicide Notes

“The worst part is, you know they're not going to be together forever. I mean, come on, she's fifteen. Okay, sixteen. Still. It's not like they're going to get married or anything. Even if they last a couple of years which they won't she'll go to one college and he'll go to another, and pretty soon they'll forget all about each other. That's what always happens. That's why teenage dating is so dumb, because it's doomed to fail. You'd think people would have learned that by now, but I guess they haven't. They go right on falling in love and thinking it's going to survive high school. Allie and Burke, true love always. Whatever.

Anyway, happy birthday, Allie. I hope it was a good one.”
― Michael Thomas Ford, Suicide Notes

“It's like whoever sits up ther in Heaven had this big bag of really crappy stuff, and once or twice a day she or he reaches in and sprinkles a little bit of it over the world and it makes everything go crazy, like fairy dust that's past its expiration date.”
― Michael Thomas Ford, Suicide Notes