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“It's not always easy to convince someone a need exists, if they don't have that need themselves.”
― Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men
― Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men
“People must be able to reconstruct their own pattern of meaning, regardless of what it looks like or how long it takes—it simply must be all their own. Experiencing depression or numbness is normal during this phase of recovery (Winell 23). I have had clients who have even gone so far as to describe it by saying, “I don’t feel alive.” Losing a former faith story means losing the meaning-making method by which a person made sense of their life and the world around them.”
― You Are Your Own: A Reckoning with the Religious Trauma of Evangelical Christianity
― You Are Your Own: A Reckoning with the Religious Trauma of Evangelical Christianity
“it’s not that people don’t love you, it’s that they don’t have the same capacity to love as you do.”
― Eloquent Rage: A Black Feminist Discovers Her Superpower
― Eloquent Rage: A Black Feminist Discovers Her Superpower
“Rather than anchoring our hope beyond the struggle, always projecting ahead, perhaps locating joy within the struggle through our full presence can be our essential gesture at this moment in time. To feel the pain of now and not look away. To act not with the hope of moving forward, always forward, but to see the wisdom of stepping sideways as we create a different space, a more conscious space in the direction of pause, where we can breathe and gather ourselves so we can gather others around us and create a community of care, even within our own families, especially within our own families.”
― Erosion: Essays of Undoing
― Erosion: Essays of Undoing
“White people raised in Western society are conditioned into a white supremacist worldview because it is the bedrock of our society and its institutions. Regardless of whether a parent told you that everyone was equal, or the poster in the hall of your white suburban school proclaimed the value of diversity, or you have traveled abroad, or you have people of color in your workplace or family, the ubiquitous socializing power of white supremacy cannot be avoided. The messages circulate 24-7 and have little or nothing to do with intentions, awareness, or agreement. Entering the conversation with this understanding is freeing because it allows us to focus on how--rather than if--our racism is manifest. When we move beyond the good/bad binary, we can become eager to identify our racist patterns because interrupting those patterns becomes more important than managing how we think we look to others.
I repeat: stopping our racist patterns must be more important than working to convince others that we don't have them. We do have them, and people of color already know we have them; our efforts to prove otherwise are not convincing. An honest accounting of these patterns is no small task given the power of white fragility and white solidarity, but it is necessary.”
― White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism
I repeat: stopping our racist patterns must be more important than working to convince others that we don't have them. We do have them, and people of color already know we have them; our efforts to prove otherwise are not convincing. An honest accounting of these patterns is no small task given the power of white fragility and white solidarity, but it is necessary.”
― White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism
Elliot’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Elliot’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
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