Catriona

“Go to bed, you fool," Calcifer said sleepily. "You're drunk."
"Who, me?" said Howl. "I assure you, my friends, I am cone sold stober." He got up and stalked upstairs, feeling for the wall as if he thought it might escape him unless he kept in touch with it. His bedroom door did escape him.”
― Diana Wynne Jones, Howl's Moving Castle

“Yes, you are nosy. You're a dreadfully nosy, horribly bossy, appallingly clean old woman. Control yourself. You're victimizing us all.”
― Diana Wynne Jones, Howl's Moving Castle

“Straight? So is spaghetti until you heat it up”
― Jet Mykles, Squire

“Fucking is for bathroom stalls and the back seat of a Toyota”
― Sage Whistler, Broken