Mike Budzik

“Treat your career like a bad boyfriend. Here's the thing. Your career won't take care of you. It won't call you back or introduce you to its parents.Your career will openly flirt with other people while you are around. It will forget you birthday and wreck your car. Your career will blow you off if you call it too much. It's never going to leave its wife.Your career is fucking other people and everyone knows but you. Your career will never marry you. (...) If your career is a bad boyfriend, it is healthy to remember you can always leave and go sleep with somebody else”
― Amy Poehler, Yes Please

“By this point, readers will probably they have endured enough of Nabokov's trashing of his rivals, and yet I cannot resist including just one last blast. By all means, feel free to skip it, especially if your stomach is turned by extreme boorishness.”
― Douglas R. Hofstadter

“Ah, this is obviously some strange usage of the word 'safe' that I wasn't previously aware of.”
― Douglas Adams

“And I wondered if hurdlers ever thought, you know, 'This would go faster if we just got rid of the hurdles.”
― John Green, The Fault in Our Stars