CNV

“My lord has read in reputable books that Icelanders emit such a foul stench that men have to position themselves upwind when speaking to them."
Jón Hreggviðsson said nothing.
The adjunct said: "My lord has read in reputable books that the abode of the damned and of devils is in Iceland, within the mountain named Hekkenfeld. Is this correct?"
Jón Hreggviðsson said that he couldn't deny it.
Next: "My lord has read in reputable books, primo, that in Iceland there are more specters, monsters, and devils that there are men; secundo, that Icelanders bury shark meat in the dungheaps by their cowsheds and afterward eat it; tertio, that starving Icelanders remove their shoes and cut pieces of them into their mouths like pancakes; quarto, that Icelanders live in mounds of earth; quinto, that Icelanders don't know how to work; sexto, that Icelanders loan foreigners their daughters for purposes of procreation; septimo, that an Icelandic girl is considered to be an unspoiled virgin until she has had her seventh illegitimate child. Is this correct?"
Jón Hreggviðsson gaped slightly.
"My lord has read in reputable books that Icelanders are primo, thievish; secundo, liars; tertio, arrogant; quarto, lice-ridden; quinto, drunkards; sexto, debauchers; septimo, cowards, unfit for war—" the adjunct said all of this without moving and the colonel continued to grind his teeth and stare at Jón Hreggviðsson. "Is this correct?"
Jón Hreggviðsson swallowed to try to wet his throat. The adjunct raised his voice and repeated:
"Is this correct?"
Jón Hreggviðsson straightened up and said:
"My forefather Gunnar of Hlíðarendi was twelve ells high."
The colonel said something to the adjunct and the adjunct said loudly:
"My lord says that whoever commits perjury beneath the standard shall suffer the wheel and the rack."
"Twelve ells," repeated Jón Hreggviðsson. "I won't take it back. And he lived to be three hundred years old. And he wore a gold band around his forehead. His halberd sang the sweetest song that has ever been heard in the North. And the girls are young and slender and come during the night to free men, and are called fair maidens and are said to have the bodies of elves—”
― Halldór Laxness, Iceland's Bell