“Scientists talk about dark matter, the invisible, mysterious substance that occupies the space between stars. Dark matter makes up 99.99 percent of the universe, and they don't know what it is. Well I do. It's apathy. That's the truth of it; pile together everything we know and care about in the universe and it will still be nothing more than a tiny speck in the middle of a vast black ocean of Who Gives a Fuck.”
― John Dies at the End
― John Dies at the End
“Well, if I ever suffer brain damage I know there's always a career waiting for me in local politics.”
― Johannes Cabal the Necromancer
― Johannes Cabal the Necromancer
“Something coming back from the dead was almost always bad news. Movies taught me that. For every one Jesus you get a million zombies.”
― John Dies at the End
― John Dies at the End
“SHUT UP. Both of you. You're coming with me." To me he said, "Put some pants on."
"Fuck you. This is my house. I make the rules. You take your clothes off. John, get the Twister mat.”
― This Book Is Full of Spiders
"Fuck you. This is my house. I make the rules. You take your clothes off. John, get the Twister mat.”
― This Book Is Full of Spiders
“PEOPLE DIE.
This is the fact the world desperately hides from us from birth. Long after you find out the truth about sex and Santa Claus, this other myth endures, this one about how you’ll always get rescued at the last second and if not, your death will at least mean something and there’ll be somebody there to hold your hand and cry over you. All of society is built to prop up that lie, the whole world a big, noisy puppet show meant to distract us from the fact that at the end, you’ll die, and you’ll probably be alone.”
― John Dies at the End
This is the fact the world desperately hides from us from birth. Long after you find out the truth about sex and Santa Claus, this other myth endures, this one about how you’ll always get rescued at the last second and if not, your death will at least mean something and there’ll be somebody there to hold your hand and cry over you. All of society is built to prop up that lie, the whole world a big, noisy puppet show meant to distract us from the fact that at the end, you’ll die, and you’ll probably be alone.”
― John Dies at the End
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