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“Aha!" I said. (Not the catchphrase just a thought.)”
― Alan Partridge, From the Oasthouse: The Alan Partridge Podcast

“Oh shit, that's right I'm a hat. (In reference to the hat's attempted suicide)”
― JK Rowling

“I am the furthest thing from a do-gooder. I am venal and flib and too clever by half, I know, but the thrill of the most brilliantly quicksilver aperҫu is no match for the self-interested high I get from having done someone a good turn. You'd think I'd do more good turns as a result, but there you go.”
― David Rakoff, Half Empty

“Nice bird, asshole!”
― Scott Lynch, The Lies of Locke Lamora