Tonya

“This thing’s giving me an eye twitch,” Ranger said. “Can you get the sound off?” I started pressing buttons and the screen went blank. “How’s that?” I asked. “Babe, you shut the system down.” “Yes, but the sound is off.” “Reprogram it.” “No need to get testy,” I told him. “I don’t know where I’m going.” “I have a map. You just get on I-95 south and take the Springfield exit.” “And then what?” “Then you’ll have to pull over and reprogram the GPS.” Ranger cut his eyes to me and there was the tiniest of smiles on his mouth.”
― Janet Evanovich, Twelve Sharp

“On a scale of one to stepping on a LEGO, how much pain are you in?”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge

“I have depth. I've read Proust. No, wait, that was Pooh. Winnie the Pooh. My bad"

Charley Davidson.”
― Darynda Jones, Fifth Grave Past the Light

“I thought you were mad at me.” “I am.” “Well, I make it a rule never to have sex with anyone who’s mad at me.” He arched a brow. “It’s a wonder you’ve ever had sex at all.”
― Darynda Jones, Seventh Grave and No Body