“One of the signature mistakes with empathy is that we believe we can take our lenses off and look through the lenses of someone else. We can’t. Our lenses are soldered to who we are. What we can do, however, is honor people’s perspectives as truth even when they’re different from ours. That’s a challenge if you were raised in majority culture—white, straight, male, middle-class, Christian—and you were likely taught that your perspective is the correct perspective and everyone else needs to adjust their lens. Or, more accurately, you weren’t taught anything about perspective taking, and the default—My truth is the truth—is reinforced by every system and situation you encounter.”
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
“For me, that strong back is grounded confidence and boundaries. The soft front is staying vulnerable and curious. The mark of a wild heart is living out these paradoxes in our lives and not giving into the either/or BS that reduces us. It’s showing up in our vulnerability and our courage, and, above all else, being both fierce and kind.”
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
“I always bring my core values to feedback conversations. I specifically bring courage, which means that I don’t choose comfort over being respectful and honest—choosing politeness over respect is not respectful.”
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
“If you are not in the arena getting your ass kicked on occasion, I’m not interested in or open to your feedback. There are a million cheap seats in the world today filled with people who will never be brave with their lives but who will spend every ounce of energy they have hurling advice and judgment at those who dare greatly. Their only contributions are criticism, cynicism, and fearmongering. If you’re criticizing from a place where you’re not also putting yourself on the line, I’m not interested in what you have to say.”
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
“In our political chaos, people throw around the word shameless when they see someone make a self-serving or unethical decision, and attributing unconscionable behavior to a lack of shame. This is wrong and dangerous. Shame isn’t the cure, it’s the cause. Don’t let what looks like a bloated ego and narcissism fool you into thinking there’s a lack of shame. Shame and fear are almost always driving that unethical behavior. We’re now seeing that shame often fuels narcissistic behavior. In fact, I define narcissism as the shame-based fear of being ordinary.”
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
― Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.
Jessica’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Jessica’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
More friends…
Favorite Genres
Polls voted on by Jessica
Lists liked by Jessica









































