Jonas

“Do you know how long a year takes when it's going away?' Dunbar repeated to Clevinger. 'This long.' He snapped his fingers. 'A second ago you were stepping into college with your lungs full of fresh air. Today you're an old man.'

'Old?' asked Clevinger with surprise. 'What are you talking about?'

'Old.'

'I'm not old.'

'You're inches away from death every time you go on a mission. How much older can you be at your age? A half minute before that you were stepping into high school, and an unhooked brassiere was as close as you ever hoped to get to Paradise. Only a fifth of a second before that you were a small kid with a ten-week summer vacation that lasted a hundred thousand years and still ended too soon. Zip! They go rocketing by so fast. How the hell else are you ever going to slow down?' Dunbar was almost angry when he finished.

'Well, maybe it is true,' Clevinger conceded unwillingly in a subdued tone. 'Maybe a long life does have to be filled with many unpleasant conditions if it's to seem long. But in that event, who wants one?'

'I do,' Dunbar told him.

'Why?' Clevinger asked.

'What else is there?”
― Joseph Heller, Catch-22

“A little grease is what makes this world go round. One hand washes the other. Know what I mean? You scratch my back, I'll Scratch yours.'
Yossarian knew what he meant.
'That's not what I meant,' Doc Daneeka said, as Yossarian began scratching his back. 'I'm talking about co-operation. Favors. You do a favor for me, I'll do one for you. Get it?'
'Do one for me,' Yossarian requested.
'Not a chance,' Doc Daneeka answered.”
― Joseph Heller, Catch-22

“Metcalf, is that your foot I'm stepping on?'
'No, sir. It must be Lieutenant Scheisskopf's foot.'
'It isn't my foot,' said Lieutenant Scheisskopf.
'Then maybe it is my foot after all,' said Major Metcalf.
'Move it.'
'Yes, sir. You'll have to move your foot first, colonel. It's on top of mine.'
'Are you telling me to move my foot?'
'No, sir. Oh, no, sir.”
― Joseph Heller, Catch-22

“Do you like fish?'
'Not especially.'
'Just why do you think you have such a morbid aversion to fish?' asked Major Sanderson triumphantly.
'They're too bland,' Yossarian answered. 'And too bony.'
Major Sanderson nodded understandingly, with a smile that was agreeable and insincere. 'That's a very interesting explanation. But we'll soon discover the true reason, I suppose. Do you like this particular fish? The one you're holding in your hand?'
'I have no feelings about it either way.'
'Do you dislike the fish? Do you have any hostile or aggressive emotions toward it?'
No, not at all. In fact, I rather like the fish.'
'Then you do like the fish.'
'Oh, no. I have no feelings toward it either way.”
― Joseph Heller, Catch-22