Amanda Wiseman

“Ye know, doan't ye, what it feels like when ye burn yer hand in takin' a cake out of the oven or wi'a match when ye're lightin' one of they godless cigarettes? Ay. It stings wi' a fearful pain, doan't it? And ye run away to clap a bit o' butter on it to take the pain away. Ah, but' (an impressive pause) 'there'll be no butter in hell!”
― Stella Gibbons, Cold Comfort Farm

“Does this smell like paprika or gunpowder to you?”
― William Ritter, Jackaby