Leslie Masur

“I also think Valkyire’s ex-boyfriend will come in handy here.”
Ravel frowned, “The dead vampire?”
Valkyrie glared at him, “I think he means Fletcher.”
“Oh. Sorry.”
“Caelen was never my boyfriend.”
“I didn’t mean to-“
“We never talk about Caelen,” Ghastly muttered.”
“I’m really sorry, Valkyrie, Ravel said. “Fletcher’s great. He’s wonderful. I’m sure he’d be delighted to help, and having a teleporter here will certainly solve some problems. We’ll arrange that, we’ll get him over to you, start the ball rolling, as it were. Once again, sorry about bringing up the vampire.”
Ghastly shot him a look whispered, “Why do you keep talking about him?”
“I can’t help it,” Ravel whispered back. “Now he’s all I can think about.”
“You realise,” Valkyrie said, “that we can hear you both perfectly well.”
― Derek Landy, Kingdom of the Wicked

“He could wear hats. He could wear an assortment of hats of different shapes and styles. Boater hats, cowboy hats, bowler hats. The list went on. Pork-pie hats, bucket hats, trillbies and panamas. Top hats, straw hats, trapper hats. Wide brim narrow brim, stingy brim. He could wear a fez. Fezzes were cool. Hadn't someone once said that fezzes were cool? He was pretty aur ether had. And they were. They were cool.”
― Derek Landy, Kingdom of the Wicked

“Personally, I think knees should be kept for the eighth or ninth date, or the wedding day. As a nice surprise you know? 'oh, my darling, you have knees! I never would have thought”
― Derek Landy, Mortal Coil

“I don’t need you sensitive, Skulduggery. I need you aloof and irresponsible and arrogant. That’s why I love you. That’s why I let you hang out with me.”

“I’m truly blessed.”

She grinned. “You love me, too. Once you admit it, everything will be better.”

“They’re about to hook up the Cube to the Accelerator,” he said, and turned and walked off.

She followed. “You can’t run from your feelings.”

“I can walk from them.”
― Derek Landy, Kingdom of the Wicked