Thatsabbie

“There are no wrong roads to anywhere.”
― Norton Juster, The Phantom Tollbooth

“Our relationship finally ended when he took to waking me up in the wee hours of the morning when he would go surfing. He thought it might be fun to have me come watch. "Fun for who?" I wanted to ask. I had never asked him to come to Happy Hour and watch me drink.”
― Chelsea Handler, My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands

“We have been sitting here all night bullshitting and we still don’t know what to do.”
― Tao Lin, Shoplifting from American Apparel

“He was all emotion all the time, constantly talking about his feelings and his profound love for her. He was minutes from getting his first period. He wrote poems too. It's my personal belief that if men are writing poems, they're making up for something else like a big hair back, or one ball. Not that one ball is a bad thing. Especially since I don't know any females who are dying to their their hands on a set of balls. The way I see it, the less balls, the better.”
― Chelsea Handler, My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands