Destiny Lund

“What I want and what I need deserves to be listened to.”
― Jennette McCurdy, I'm Glad My Mom Died

“She gave me breast and vaginal exams until I was seventeen years old. These 'exams' made my body stiff with discomfort. I felt violated, yet I had no voice, no ability to express that. I was conditioned to believe any boundary I wanted was a betrayal of her, so I stayed silent. Cooperative.

When I was six years old, she pushed me into a career I didn't want. I'm grateful for the financial stability that career has provided me, but not much else. I was not equipped to handle the entertainment industry and all of its competitiveness, rejection, stakes, harsh realities, fame. I needed that time, those years, to develop as a child. To form my identity. To grow. I can never get those years back.

She taught me an eating disorder when I was eleven years old--an eating disorder that robbed me of my joy and any amount of free-spiritedness that I had.”
― Jennette McCurdy, I'm Glad My Mom Died

“I'm trying every day to face myself. The results vary, but the attempts are consistent.”
― Jennette McCurdy, I'm Glad My Mom Died

“She took care of me and my brothers, I’m sure that was really hard for her.’

‘That was her job.’

I feel interrogated, like I can’t say the right thing. I speed up, trying to explain myself.

‘Well, but I mean this was different from most parents.’ Shit. I hated how that came out.

‘How so?’

I pause to compose myself. Laura won’t rattle me. I speak in an even, measured tone.

‘She sacrificed everything for me. She constantly went without so she could take care of me. She put me first, ahead of herself.’

‘Hmm. And do you think that’s healthy?’

What kind of fresh hell is this? What is this impossible-to-ace quiz? I have no idea how I’m supposed to be answering to make Mom look good.”
― Jennette McCurdy, I'm Glad My Mom Died