Oih

“Hassan said, "I'm a Kuwaiti exchange student; my dad's an oil baron."
Colin shook his head, "Too obvious. I'm a Spaniard. A refugee. My parents were murdered by Basque separatists."
"I don't know if Basque is a thing or a person and neither will they, so no. Okay, I just got to America from Honduras. My name is Miguel. My parents made a fortune in bananas, and you are my bodyguard, because the banana workers' union wants me dead."
Colin shot back, "That's good, but you don't speak Spanish. Okay, I was abducted by Eskimos in the Yukon Terr-no, that's crap. We're cousins from France visiting the United States for the first time. It's out high school graduation trip."
"That's boring, but we're out of time. I'm the English speaker?" asked Hassan. "Yeah, fine."
"Okay, they're coming," said Hassan. "What's your name?"
"Pierre."
"Okay. I'm Salinger, pronounced SalinZHAY."
........
"He has Tourette's?" asked Katrina.
"MERDE!" (Shit) shouted Colin.
"Yes," said Hassan excitedly. "same word both language, like hemorrhoid. That one we learned yesterday because Pierre had the fire in his bottom. He has Toorettes. And the hemorrhoid. But, is good boy.
"Ne dis pas que j'ai des hemorroides! Je n'ai pas d'hemorroide," (Don't say I have hemorrhoids! I don't have hemorrhoids.) Colin shouted, at once trying to continue the game and get Hassan on to a different topic.
Hassan looked at Colin, nodded knowingly, and then told Katrina, "He just said that your face, it is beautiful like the hemorrhoid.”
― John Green, An Abundance of Katherines

“I'm a grenade and at some point I'm going to blow up and I would like to minimize the casualties, okay?”
― John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

“Behind her, the door to the stairwell opens, and Tobias steps out with Marcus and Caleb behind him, almost unnoticed.
Almost, except I notice him, because I have trained myself to notice him.”
― Veronica Roth, Insurgent

“I really wanted to take her photo, so I walked up to the nearest adult and asked, 'Does she belong to you?' Suddenly the music stopped, and I heard: 'I belong to myself!”
― Brandon Stanton, Humans of New York