Amanda

“To this day, being able to “take advantage” of someone is the measure in my mind of having a parent. For me and Lindsay, the fear of imposing stalked our minds, infecting even the food we ate. We recognized instinctively that many of the people we depended on weren’t supposed to play that role in our lives, so much so that it was one of the first things Lindsay thought of when she learned of Papaw’s death. We were conditioned to feel that we couldn’t really depend on people—that, even as children, asking someone for a meal or for help with a broken-down automobile was a luxury that we shouldn’t indulge in too much lest we fully tap the reservoir of goodwill serving as a safety valve in our lives.”
― J.D. Vance, Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis

“People like Brian and me don’t lose contact with our parents because we don’t care; we lose contact with them to survive. We never stop loving, and we never lose hope that our loved ones will change. Rather, we are forced, either by wisdom or by the law, to take the path of self-preservation. What”
― J.D. Vance, Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis

“In other words, despite all of the environmental pressures from my neighborhood and community, I received a different message at home. And that just might have saved me.”
― J.D. Vance, Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis