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Jarod Kintz
“I'm asexual, though occasionally I'm attracted to inanimate objects. Mainly tube-shaped objects.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

Jarod Kintz
“Sometimes I’ll forget a utensil’s name, and I’ll say, “Give me that pointy thing,” as I point with my pointy finger.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

Jarod Kintz
“The easiest way to get from point A to point B is with a vehicle that runs on alphabet soup.”
Jarod Kintz, Great Listener Seeks Mute Women

Jarod Kintz
“I want to keep a human mouth on my coffee table. It’ll be a great conversation starter.”
Jarod Kintz, I Want

Bauvard
“Neighbors are the most indecent sort of folk around. Nothing but voyeurs and gossipers. As a community we would be much better off without them.”
Bauvard, The Prince Of Plungers

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