Henry

“I think I might have a disorder where your emotions frequently malfunction and a lot of the time you're sitting there feeling something inappropriate. It should be called Emotional Moron Disorder”
― Jesse Andrews, Me and Earl and the Dying Girl

“It is a universally acknowledged truth that high school sucks. In fact, high school is where we are first introduced to the basic existential question of life: How is it possible to exist in a place that sucks so bad?”
― Jesse Andrews, Me and Earl and the Dying Girl

“So. If this was some normal fictional young-adult book, this is the part of the story where after the film, the entire high school would rise to their feet and applaud, and Earl and I would find True Acceptance and begin to Truly Believe in Ourselves and Rachel would somehow miraculously make a recovery, or maybe she would die but we would Always Have Her to Thank for Making Us Discover Our Inner Talent, and Madison would become my girlfriend and I would get to nuzzle her boobs like an affectionate panda cub whenever I wanted.

That is why fiction sucks. None of that happened. Instead, pretty much everything happened that I was afraid of, except worse.”
― Jesse Andrews, Me and Earl and the Dying Girl

“You could have an eight-inch thick titanium diaper bolted to your pelvis, and you would still somehow get laid. It should be their official tourism slogan: Israel Where Virginity Goes to Die.”
― Jesse Andrews, Me and Earl and the Dying Girl